


The Paper Bag Princess

by anarchycox



Series: The Idiot Squad [3]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Absurd, All Hail Carol, Alpha Roxy, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Crack Treated Seriously, Epistolary, In part - Freeform, Mail Order Brides, Misunderstandings, More angst than expected, Multi, True Love, but they are fantastic, cricket bats, dub con in abo style, harry/percival relationship, look they are such idiots, omega tilde, we all know this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2018-01-31
Packaged: 2018-12-20 04:14:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 24,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11912997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox
Summary: Harry is tired of pack alpha Merlin being alone. So he decides to place an ad basically offering up Merlin. And amid all the horrid responses there is one that is a shining star. Harry decides to bring her to London - Tilde is perfect for Merlin, he is sure they'll fall in love.Roxy takes one look at Tilde and knows this is her mate.But she is totally going to be much more chill about love and courting than her Dad and Harry were.Merlin mostly wonders where the blonde came from and why his fruit tarts keep disappearing.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elletromil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elletromil/gifts), [InsaneRedDragon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneRedDragon/gifts).
  * Translation into 中文 available: [【翻譯】The Paper Bag Princess](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13584099) by [sandykill](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandykill/pseuds/sandykill)



> Right next part of our dear idiot squad. This will in part be epistolary thanks to elletromil and insanereddragon (hence gifting it to them) because they claimed there needed to be more epistolary in the Kingsman and they are right. I am aiming for lots of letters, emails, texts etc, we shall see if I pull it off.
> 
> Roxy is about 21, Tilde 27.

Tilde escaped the dreadful ball. Her parents were good people, but there insistence that she could find the right alpha at one of these mating calls was driving her mad. Today there was an alpha that told her she would love being a traditional mate to him. He even mentioned a leash beside his bed. Tilde shuddered. She had sneaked out after an endlessly long two hours. She found a cab and made her way home. Tilde sat in the kitchens with the cook and butler and they laughed at her impressions of all the alphas at the party as they made her a decent sandwich.

"You know, you should find an alpha," the cook said.

Tilde blinked. "I do not want one of those sort."

The cook shook her head. "No, not the ones at these balls. They are all..."

"Dire," the butler offered.

"Knothead pisspot assholes who would not find a g-spot with a flash light and a map," Cook offered.

Tilde snorted a little into her beer. Clearly the two had enjoyed a nip or three before Tilde's arrival.

Cook pointed at her. "You need a real alpha. Look here," she said and handed Tilde her tablet.

"Online mating?" Tilde said.

"Read it mostly for a laugh, but some interesting people in there."

"Hmmm," Tilde replied. They all heard a noise at the front door and collectively sighed. Her parents were home.

Tilde went out and enjoyed the hour long lecture about how the alphas there had been perfectly nice, and how she was past the age to climb out a window. Tilde refrained from pointing out it was the back door not a window. Eventually she went to bed and pulled up the site the cook had shown her.

**PerfectMate.com**

Tilde decided to thrown in the most absurd parameters to see what would come up and scrolled through. Nothing was really that interesting. And then one caught her eye. The photo of the alpha made him look like a murderer. She wanted to see the description that went with it.

_Are you looking for a different sort of alpha?_

_Caring, protective, but progressive in viewpoint?_

_Rich, bald, talented, creative._

_Owns a huge estate for his pack, owns a company with a staff of 60, that offers generous benefits (and if you require a job as well as a mate, we can get you one)._

_Older, but not stuck in his ways._

_Look, his pack is desperate for him to find a mate. He’s a good man, but a super computer nerd. He hasn’t changed his jumper in a week. He has rock hard abs under said jumper just in case you are worried he is fat. He has also never said ‘well actually’ once in his life._

_I will buy you a car just to take one date with him. He’s honestly wonderful and has a stupid amount of love to give, he is just really stupid about people._

_Looking for breathing beta or omega, age 18-55, not serial killer. Unless it is sort of anti-hero only kill bad guys serial killer. We can make some allowances._

_Here is a photo, no it is not altered to make him more attractive:_

__

_Yes he looks a little intense, he is a little intense, but manageable intense._

_We need to get him out of the bloody house._

_Please answer this ad._

_No dick pics._

_Must submit favourite movie, album, and book for judgement._

_DesperatePackMember_

Tilde read the copy 5 times.

This couldn't be a real ad. It had to be some sort of prank or joke. She giggled she loved that sort of thing. She had to answer it. Just to see how it played out. Maybe it was some sort of online game she had stumbled into, a role playing thing. Tilde went back to the main page and created a profile just to answer the message.

**********************************************

Harry ran through the estate to the family room where Percival and Roxy were watching a movie. "We got an actual answer!"

"Oh this can't be good," Percival muttered. "An answer to what darling?"

"The ad I put out to mate Merlin off, and look an answer without a dick pic." Harry threw his tablet to Percival who looked.

"I thought we agreed you wouldn't do this," Percival said. He groaned when he read the ad that Harry had placed. "Really that photo?"

Harry is unrepentant. "Look at the response though."

_Dear DesperatePackMember_

_What an intriguing ad! Much more interesting that the others on this site. Thank you for your honestly about your pack alpha. He is as you say intense, but there is a charm there in how he holds the knife like he is ready to fillet someone._

_I am not a serial killer. Though I have to be honest, I am ruthless about spiders. I know they eat other bugs, but really that is too many legs and they must all die._

_My favourite movie is this small foreign indie movie that few have ever heard of called Singing in the Rain. Album is anything by AC/DC or Mozart, and book is A Room with a View._

_I do not have a dick so easy enough not to send along a 'dick pic'_

_You do not need to buy me a car to date him, I own 5. But you may have to fly me in, as I am Swedish but from your descriptions it sounds like out of England is what you have to resort to if you want to get a date for him._

_However I will not be flown in until I know more. Share stories of your pack._

_SwedishGirl18293_

"That is...an interesting response," Percival said in surprise.

"Right?" Harry said. His scent was just so excited.

Percival pulled him down to the couch. "One decent response doesn't mean anything Harry, don't get your hopes up."

"Have you even looked at their profile yet?" Roxy asked.

"No, who cares, I'm bringing them in," Harry said.

Roxy and Percival both rolled their eyes.

Roxy clicked on the name and was sent to the profile. She skimmed the words not super paying attention.

Then there was the photo.

Harry and Percival were bickering about what to do and Roxy just stared at the photo.

"She is perfect for Merlin!" Harry shouted.

 _ **Mine**_ , Roxy's brain screamed. She managed to just control her rising scent.

"How about I answer her?" Roxy suggested as casually as possible. "You both are rather horrible at flirtatious letters."

"I am not," Harry protested.

"Dearest love, my beautiful Percival, I have missed you dreadfully on this business trip. When I get home I would truly appreciate it if we took turns stuffing our cocks up each other arses. I have include some illustrations for my preferred positions for this plan. All my heart my sexy beast of a beta. Harry," Percival quoted the last letter Harry had sent him. He looked at his daughter. "Respond, let us see what happens."

Roxy nodded. She could certainly respond to her future mate.

Err, she meant Merlin's potential future mate.

No big deal. 

She was under control.


	2. Chapter 2

Tilde was going through her mail pile, mostly invitations to parties, a few charity requests, her phone bill, and one beautiful envelope from England; it had been forwarded via the match company. It was a thick paper stock and she had to admit the writing on the front was quite elegant, and a pretty sketch of flowers along the bottom. She used a knife to slit open the envelope and pull out the letter and photo.

_Dear SwedishGirl,_

_We thank you for answering that horrible ad, and on behalf of my father and myself I swear there is more sanity in our pack than that ad suggests. My stepfather wrote that and he is a wee bit dramatic. But the truth is our pack alpha, does need a mate. He is a bit lost on his own even if he doesn't see it. He is an incredibly good man in rather worn jumpers at times. He is smart, talented, giving, and adores his pack. If you were to consider us and to be a good fit, you would never feel unwanted._

_I met him when I was ten. Dad and I were a team, you see, my omega father had died a couple years before. My dad took a job with their company and ended up courted by the moron who wrote the ad offering Merlin up. Merlin had no clue what to do with a little girl, but he tried. He was the sort who though a college bond was a good Christmas gift, but before I was even pack, he defended me better than any alpha could. When it was made clear I was alpha a, he guided me, helped me, taught me how to think, how to fight, how to be in control._

_He can look terrifying, I won't lie to you, he is terrifying, but he loves so very much, and all that terror is to protect his pack._

_Merlin loves fruit tarts, and coding on his computer. He is a boxer, and likes to dance around the house in his socks when no one is around and loves old science fiction movies where everything was silly little models._

_You could do much worse than consider him your alpha, consider us for your pack._

_The photo is of he and I at a game launch event._

_Sincerely,_

_Roxy Rockford_

_Mathe Pack_

__

Tilde looked at the photo, and he did seem like a much different man than the photo in the ad suggested. Here he looked less murder alpha and rather friendly. He certainly was attractive. And Roxy was quite beautiful and it was nice to put a face to the person writing the letter. And it was a nice letter but not quite the details she wanted. It hinted that he wasn't perfect, which was nice, but wasn't enough of a measure to go on. But it was rather nice to receive a real letter. And Tilde realized that maybe this wasn't a game, but an actual ad a pack put out.

Tilde opened her desk drawer and pulled out some of her own paper.

_Dear Roxy,_

_Thank you for your letter, I do appreciate it, and the fact that it was a letter and not an email, makes it especially lovely. And I am grateful for a less stabby photo. You both look happy and beautiful. I have to admit that I thought the original ad was perhaps some sort of game, and responded on a whim to see what would happen. I thought it was code or a prank, but your letter here suggests that it was authentic, even if a little absurd. I admit I am at a bit of a loss._

_My family feels that it is time for me to mate, and they aren't wrong. I do long for a pack, but the alphas I am meeting here, do not suit my needs...and I know I do not suit theirs, no matter what they think._

_But you still speak in generalities, I need specifics to truly see the measure of the man._

_Can you not send me 3 stories that exemplify who he is as an alpha?_

_Also, game launch?_

_I have included a more casual photo as well._

__

_I look forward to hearing more from you, Ms Roxy._

_Sincerely,_

_Tilde_

 

"She has bloody freckles," Roxy moaned when she saw the photo. "Oh god, look at them," she said.

"I don't think Merlin has an objection to freckles," Harry said thoughtfully. He was clearly trying to sort through memories. "No, nothing against freckles. He likes you."

"Point of fact, he has never thought about Roxy in a sexual manner," Percival said, not looking up from a spreadsheet he was working on.

This is of course when Merlin walked in. "Who has nae thought about Roxy in a sexual manner. Is it a lad ye like? I can beat them up." 

Roxy smiled. "You actually."

Merlin paled. "I just threw up a little." He flinched. "Oh god, ew, no." His eyes then widened in horror. "You don't think about me that way do you?"

Roxy also felt some bile rise. "Oh fuck that is disgusting. Your dick is so gross."

"So is yours," he snapped back.

"I would appreciate less talk about my daughter's dick thank you," Percival added. He looked up. "Though of course my dear, you are perfection."

"Thanks, Dad," she said. "How do you feel about freckles, Merlin?"

Merlin frowned. "They are a bitch to skin to look naturally."

All three hung their heads. "On a real person, you idiot," Harry said.

Merlin thought about it. "I have no opinions about freckles. Now who wants to punch something?"

Roxy popped up. "I will," and the two happily went to spar.

"Roxy likes freckles," Percival said to Harry.

"That's nice," Harry agreed.

Percival looked at him and thought about explaining what that meant but Harry was working on a butterfly. And frankly Percival wanted to see what would happen, this was promising to be interesting.

***********************************

_Dear Tilde,_

_I am sorry that you thought it was all a joke. That is Harry's fault, he's an idiot. But he is quite sincere in his belief our pack alpha needs a mate, and this is what he resorted to._

_I have three stories, as you asked._

_My first memory of him and I truly alone and forging our own bond was before my father wed Merlin's pack mate Harry. It was the anniversary of my father's death and I was hurting so much, and he didn't coddle me, but knew I needed an outlet, so he took me to the boxing ring and didn't go easy on me even though I was eleven. He wailed and I wailed back and it felt so primal and perfect and reminded me rage well focused wasn't bad. And then he taught me to burp the alphabet. We absolutely certainly do not have contests to see who can do it better._

_He wouldn't pack bite me until I was 18, sure that being alpha a, I wouldn't want to submit, would want to create my own pack. But I never wanted to be in charge like that, and the day I turned 18 he once again offered me an out, asked me if I was sure. He was so sweet, and scared that I would say I wanted out, scared I wanted to stay, it is hard to tell sometimes what he feels, but you know he feels a lot. I said traditional words about wanting to be a part of the pack and then he bit me and hugged me tight and said the honour was all his that a woman like me would stick herself to an idiot pack alpha like him. The honour has always been mine to be a part of this family._

_I finished university early, skipped a couple of grades, and we all knew I was always going to work for the family business, Kingsman Games. I wanted in the marketing department and had been interning for years, and I admit, I thought I would walk into the job. And he wouldn't hire me. There weren't any openings in the department and he wouldn't create one just for me. I worked as a waitress and sent out a million resumes and then finally after 5 months a maternity leave temporary fill in post was needed. And I applied and got an interview. I still thought then it was all for show, and now it would be handed to me. But god, the human resources manager and Merlin just hammered at me, a million questions, tearing my portfolio apart, and it was a mess especially considering Merlin was one of my references on all my other applications. And I had to wait for the rest of the interviews to finish. I stayed at a friend's house, I couldn't bear to look at Merlin, I was so furious, and thought maybe that our friendship, our family wasn't what I thought it was._

_I got the job._

_I went to our home and was just ready to scream at him for putting me through all that bullshit. And he greets me with this blinding smile, all happiness and this scent of pride pouring off his skin. He lifted me up and just spun me around. 'Fuck lass, I knew ye could do it," he said. I told him I knew I could, and he replied 'Sure and when anyone gives you shit for your job and not paying your dues because ye are pack with the president of the company, ye can put them on their ass, because you damn well know you are there on merit.' And it was just so him, to give me hell like that, to make it difficult to make it better. We got so drunk that night._

_My growl sounds like his._

_There are better men out there, better alphas, but not by much._

_Please consider at least meeting him._

_Yours in hope,_

_Roxy_

Tilde read the letter five times, memorizing what she learned about Merlin and this Roxy. She looked up Kingsman Games and was a bit impressed. She downloaded one of their titles and ended up being up until 2am playing.

********************************

"We have a new letter, from Tilde," Roxy said, walking into the kitchen.

"Who?" Merlin was at the stove, doing a fry up.

Harry quickly shook his head, the man would just say no.

"A pen pal," Harry said. "Excuse us." He dragged Roxy out. "He can't know until she is a done deal," he hissed.

"He should have a say in his own life," Roxy said.

"When has that ever worked for him? We have left him to have his say for 10 years, he's barely even dated!" Harry calmed himself. "Now what does it say?"

Roxy carefully opened the envelope and pulled out a single fold of paper. She read out loud: " _To Ms Roxy Rockford, why the fuck did all of you decide that a water level was a good idea in The Rebel Code? I hate all of you. Sincerely, Tilde._ " Roxy bit back a laugh. " _P.S. I am singularly pissed off that Jax could not romance Farrel, burn in hell."_

Harry grinned. "Send her the free code for the expansion, I think she will be pleased."

"I'll do that," Roxy said. And maybe a few other free enticements. They were trying to woo the girl after all.

Merlin.

Merlin was trying to woo the girl.

He just didn't know it. This was all for him. Because he deserved happiness.

Roxy went and put the letter in the box she had in her room.

Just for safe keeping.


	3. Chapter 3

_Dearest Roxy,_

_Thank you for the expansion download code, and the t-shirt, and chocolates it was a very sweet gift to put together on behalf of your pack alpha. The expansion much improved my mood about the game, though that romance should have been an option right from the beginning of the game. Because they are perfect together._

_I did not make a fanvid._

_I am sending along some treats as well, for your pack to enjoy._

_Tilde._

 

 

_Dear Tilde,_

_The cookies lasted less than five minutes. There were weapons out as Harry and Merlin fought for the last one._

_They were so busy that I managed to grab it._

_Only I was a little too smug about my victory and my father stole the cookie off me. Being bonded to Harry has made him shifty. I keep forgetting that._

_The scarf was gorgeous, but not quite Merlin's style._

_Roxy._

 

 

_Dearest Roxy,_

_The scarf was a gift for you as a thank you for how you are facilitating this experience. It must be awkward having to act as a go between and I appreciate all the work._

_It is a big weekend here and I have to attend several parties where I know my parents will push alphas at me. Ones I have met before, ones I have no interest in. They want me happy and secure and...my father is a bit of a snob? He feels me looking elsewhere than our social peers is not a good idea._

_Only these men and women are shit, Roxy._

_Inbred, royal, annoying mother fuckers who like me for my name, my father's money, and that I am pretty._

_They do not care about my MBA or the charity functions I've organized (because apparently going to work how I wanted was not appropriate)._

_They want what is best for me, but they don't see that our definitions are radically different._

_My apologies, this is not your problem._

_Tilde._

 

 

_To Tilde:_

_Attached is a 7 page pdf of the packs holdings, lineage, the titles that Harry Hart actually carries._

_Merlin is not titled but his net worth and family history should suit._

_We hope this helps you out in telling people that you are being courted by your equal and at this time cannot engage in flirtations or expectations on the chance of being rude._

_Sincerely,_

_Percival_

 

 

Tilde opened the files and smiled. It was a thing of beauty, organized lists, spreadsheets and photos with insurance values on a flat in London, an estate in the country, a castle in Scotland and a Villa in Italy. It had Merlin's lineage and Harry's titles and was enough to give even her father pause. She printed off the relevant pages and went to the breakfast room.

"Papa, Mama," she greeted them and sat down with the pages. She smiled and her father sighed recognizing her stubborn look.

"You are going to the party tonight," he said, expecting her usual attempt to get out of it.

"Of course, Papa," she said easily and thanked the servant for the plate of food. "But you will not push any alphas at me."

"Darling, we just want you happy and settled," her mother said gently.

"I am taking care of it myself," Tilde said.

"Stabbing alphas with your butter knife is not taking care of it," her father answered.

Tilde handed him the sheets. "No but being courted by Logan Mathe, President of Kingsman Games, net worth 16 million pounds is." She made sure not to react as her mother spit out her coffee.

"You have accepted a courting offer?" her mother asked, stunned.

"I have," Tilde said. She realized that she actually had. She really needed to tell them that. "We are moving cautiously right now as it is all correspondence, but I am hoping to arrange a visit in a few weeks."

Her father was furiously reading the papers, but they were hard to argue with. It was a small but impressive pack. He noticed something that concerned him though. "The whole pack is alphas."

"Percival is a beta."

"Beta a," he said quickly. "And darling, with you being the only omega, what would their intentions be?"

Tilde glared at him. "Nothing untoward."

"Have you told them, how you feel?" her mother asked.

Tilde looked at her plate. "I was waiting. It is hard to put in a letter."

Her father reached out and held her hand. "If this is what you want, we will support you."

"Thank you Papa," she said and squeezed his hand.

Her mother took the sheets and looked. "Oh my, this is an attractive pack." She looked at the photo. "Very, very attractive."

"They are, aren't they?" Tilde agreed. 

"Not that attractive," her father muttered. Tilde and her mother shared a grin.

At the parties that weekend, her parents actually steered suitors away from her. Tilde almost had a good time.

 

_Dearest Roxy,_

_Could we maybe arrange a visit soon?_

_Tilde._

 

Roxy saw that email and panicked. She grabbed the scarf Tilde had sent and her coat and went for a walk. This was good her wanting to come, to meet the pack. But it meant sharing Tilde with all of them. It meant Tilde wouldn't be hers anymore, she'd be there to meet Merlin. Roxy couldn't understand why that thought felt so hollow. She went and got a stupid sugary coffee and a donut the size of her head. She ate it viciously. It was stupid to be this angry. Roxy was just mad that Harry's plan actually worked. That's all it was, being annoyed because of how smug he would be. Nothing else.

She went back to the office and knocked on Merlin's door. "Hey, you cool if we have a visit to the estate for a week or two?"

Merlin looked up from his computer and blinked at her. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are we peopling? We had people over like two weeks ago?" He thought about it. "Didn't we?"

"You mean Harry and Dad's anniversary party a month ago?" Roxy looked at him and shook her head. "Are you getting more hermity?"

"Nae," Merlin said. "So, friend?"

"Yeah...a friend," she agreed.

"Okay, we can put some of the weapons away." Merlin went back to typing. "Always glad to meet a friend of yours, darling."

"Great," Roxy forced a smile.

Merlin sniffed and made a face. "Why do ye smell bitter?" He looked at her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Merlin, nothing's wrong." Roxy left and went back to her office to arrange flights for Tilde. She never took the scarf off.


	4. Chapter 4

_Roxy,_

_I am preparing for the trip and have the itinerary (which oh that is a thing of beauty and precision even if overly detailed considering it is one flight and you are picking me up). I have been checking the weather which seems rather...Englandy. But what clothes should I pack, will there be more formal events, what does your alpha like. My wardrobe is rather robust and it is no trouble to pack multiple things. I also want to bring gifts for your whole pack. You are already taken care of, that was easy, but the others? Please advise._

_Tilde._

_P.S. how the fuck do I beat that final boss in The Rebel Code?_

 

**Tilde,**

**Those levers on the side wall, have your character shoot them and things fall on the boss making the attack easier.**

**I swear I saw the sun for 10 seconds yesterday, but yes it has been very wet. We have extra wellies and umbrellas at the estate. As for what to pack, comfortable? Merlin honestly won't notice unless you are naked, and even then maybe not if some coding is bothering him. The estate can be a little drafty so a couple extra cardigans would be a good idea. And slippers. Fuzzy ones, that look like unicorns.**

**You don't need to bring anything but yourself, you do us a great honour by giving us a chance.**

**But Harry likes art supplies, butterflies, and biscuits.**

**My father, Percival, likes caramels, Harry, and journals.**

**Merlin likes any gift he gets. Swear to god even the stuff I made at school, which was shit, is still somewhere in his office. One Christmas Harry gave him a set of steak knives that he had gotten for free with buying a new skillet and Merlin thought they were great. He likes knives in general, and swords, oh and socks. He really likes socks.**

**I look forward to meeting you.**

**Roxy**

 

_You want me to bring him weapons and socks?_

 

**Honestly, those are his favourite things on the planet. Those, fruit tarts and us. He already has an us, and fruit tarts might not travel well.**

 

_I found these socks:_

__

 

**Oh man, he'll love those. Stop being so perfect.**

 

_I'll see you on the 10th, at Heathrow, Gate L at approximately 2:18pm (seriously that itinerary was impressive)_

 

Roxy sat in her office and had a quiet freak out. She had to leave for the airport soon, to meet Tilde. 

For Merlin.

She was picking up the most perfect woman in the world for her pack alpha. Who still had no clue that this was the most perfect woman in the world and was meant for him. Harry had wrestled him to the ground and put him in a new jumper, which should have been a red flag for Merlin but in the end he had decided that Harry was just in a fussy mood and rolled with it. Roxy nodded, this was all fine. She would help the two connect and it would be all good. Besides Tilde might smell all wrong for Roxy, she knew Tilde was omega and all too often they just smelled too sweet to Roxy. Yeah, it was completely fine.

But Roxy went to the bathroom and touched up the little bit of makeup that she wore and brushed her hair. She checked that her suit looked good, and adjusted her tie. It was one of the one's Harry picked out, so it had a touch of boldness to it, more than the ones her dad bought her. She sighed and left the bathroom and ran into her father just outside.

"Hi, Dad," she said. "Don't worry, I know the schedule. Plenty of time to get to the airport."

"Be careful," was all he said. "Please?"

"I know the drivers are idiots around the airport," she assured him. He did like to worry.

Percival came over and kissed her cheek. "Please be careful, with you."

"Sure, Dad," she said, not having a clue what he meant. "I'm off."

He nodded and went along to his office. Roxy went to the parking garage where her little tricked out Audi was not there. The Bentley was, but not her car. "HARRY!!!!" she roared and spun around but he wasn't there. "WHERE'S MY CAR?" There was a note on the windshield,

 _this car is more impressive, you will drive it_.

"My car is plenty impressive," she muttered. But there wasn't time to hunt down her car and she got in the Bentley which she hated driving, it was a boat, an aircraft carrier in comparison to her sweet little car that Merlin bought her when she started at Kingsman properly. She drove to the airport and paid through the nose for the valet parking. She walked into the chaos that was Heathrow and for a minute was overwhelmed with all the different scents that filled the place. It was such a mix of happy and sad, and panic, she wondered how people could work there.

She went to where she was supposed to meet Tilde and looked up at the board, the plane had landed on time which was rather a shock, but it was a trip planned by her father - the universe would not dare cock it up. People started coming from the doors and Roxy looked around herself. Shit, she should have had a sign, what if Tilde didn't recognize her. Oh god, Tilde would wander Heathrow for hours and be sure that she was abandoned and then leave and Roxy would go home and have to tell Harry who would kill her with an axe. She was going to die by axe, she didn't want to die that way it would be so messy.

"Hello, Roxy?" a voice said and a scent hit Roxy. A mix of citrusy lotion, and a cool breeze of a natural scent, not quite omega but not the neutral of a beta. It smelled like laundry on the line and fresh cut grass with a hint of the flowers from the garden. There was blonde hair in a ponytail, and freckles and perfect eyes.

"You are perfect," Roxy whispered staring at Tilde.

Tilde rolled her eyes. "I got off a flight where I sat next to an alpha going through puberty, I must smell a fright."

Roxy shook her head and then growled a little. "They didn't do anything did they?" She scanned the crowd for a young alpha punk, ready to dismember them.

Tilde laughed a bit. "We argued about your video games. He thought The Rebel Gauntlet was better than The Rebel Code."

"You both will be blown away by The Rebel Conspiracy, the game we are working on right now," Roxy promised. She couldn't stop staring at Tilde. "Hi," she said.

"Hello," Tilde smiled. "According to the schedule, shouldn't we be walking to the car?"

"Yes" Roxy said and didn't move. Just kept staring at Tilde.

Tilde laughed at her. "Did you work too hard this morning or something, you seem stunned?"

"No, it's fine. Car, estate, settle you in." Roxy nodded and they started to move.

"Yes, I have been practicing," Tilde said cheerfully.

"Practicing?"

"I had my cook teach me how to make fruit tarts," Tilde said happily. "I think I have them down and after a shower and settling in, I want to make some, yes?"

Fruit tarts for Merlin, Roxy realized. Because they are his favourite. And Tilde was here to be Merlin's mate.

And then she understood why her father told her to be careful.

Roxy swallowed and controlled her sinking scent. "He'll love that."

"I look forward to meeting him," Tilde said as the doors opened.

"I am sure you'll be impressed."

Tilde talked about her flight while they waited for the car to be brought around. Roxy smiled and tried not to believe in love at first sight.

She was failing horribly at it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think we need a little Merlin POV don't we?

There were new socks on his bed. Merlin tried to remember if he had bought some and left them there. No, unlikely. An online ordered that arrived? He checked his phone but the only thing he had ordered online in the last week were these new Shaolin blades for he and Harry to muck about with and they were a custom build so not arriving for two more weeks at which time they would have to hide them so Percival didn't do his you are children running with scissors lecture.

Merlin shrugged and figured woo mystery socks. He put them on as he changed from the annoying scratchy jumper Harry had forced onto him this morning, into sweats and a tshirt. He was sure he was forgetting something about the day, but he'd figure it out eventually. Merlin wanted to play some Mario Kart. He walked through the estate, figuring he had the place alone, Harry and Percival had had a budget meeting which meant they were going to argue and then shag in Harry's office before coming home.

Roxy had something on her schedule, he knew that, they all told him it was important but he just couldn't remember. But he realized he likely had the estate to himself and ditched his t-shirt and left it on the railing. He debated ditching the sweats too, but he didn't have pants on underneath and only socks was a stupid look, even when you had a house to yourself. He took a run and slid down the hallway. "Good socks," he said to himself as he made it a decent distance. Merlin vaguely registered something was different about the coat rack by the door but couldn't place it.

And then he noticed the smell. Pastry and fruit. He hurried to the kitchen, perhaps a couple treats had been adding to the grocery delivery. "Fruit tarts, fruit tarts, I love you so. Fruit tarts fruit tarts you will make my tummy grow," he sang happily to himself as he went into the kitchen and saw Roxy staring at a blonde woman like she was the moon and wonder woman and kittens all rolled into one.

Shit, right they were peopling.

"Hi," Merlin said and hoped the stranger hadn't heard the fruit tart song.

"Hello, you sing very well," she said.

Crap, he made a bad impression on one of Roxy's friends. Again.

"Also, isn't it a little cold to be wearing so little?" she asked.

Merlin looked down and remembered he had ditched the shirt. "I run hot," he explained. "And forgot we were having company."

Roxy sighed. She went over and picked up his hand and held it to his face. On the palm it said "Company"

"Ye wrote it on my left hand, I never notice my left hand," Merlin said. "I'm Merlin," he told the stranger. Omega, he scented once he got past the smell of the fruit tarts.

"Tilde," she replied and held out a hand. "I have heard much about you." She blushed a little when she saw the berry stains on her fingers. 

Merlin didn't care and shook her hand. "I have heard..." he thought about it and couldn't remember. "Have I heard about her?"

"Oh good god, you are worse than usual," Roxy muttered.

"Blame Harry and that bloody dungeon he has his heart set on!" Merlin complained. "Do ye know how hard it is to code those moving walls?"

"No," Roxy said. "And I don't care. Dad send you a file about Tilde, you were supposed to read it."

Merlin scanned his brain. "Tilde. Swedish, posh, nice, don't be you, act human around her." He smiled proud of himself and then growled when Roxy hit him. "What?"

"You don't say that out loud. Not to her," Roxy hissed and hit him again. "She's Tilde!" Another hit.

Merlin put more warning in the growl and his scent rose. "Roxy," he warned.

Roxy growled back and soon they were on the ground rolling about.

Tilde took the fruit tarts out of the oven and put them on a rack to cool. She took a cup of tea and went to the table and sat and watched what seemed to have devolved into a find the tickle spots fight because soon were both just slapping and giggling. And then Merlin's sweats loosened enough that they fell off his arse. "This is a more interesting introduction than I expected," Tilde said. "Is this the common greeting of pack alphas in England? I needed to visit more."

Roxy and Merlin both still on the ground and Roxy aggressively yanked up his sweats. "Ow, my dick," he shouted when the waistband snapped hard.

"Oh shut it, you are embarrassing me," Roxy said and stood up. "I am so sorry Tilde, he is just a moron."

"Am not," Merlin muttered. He saw the tarts and went to grab one and burned his fingers. "Ow," he muttered.

Tilde snorted and went over to him. "Let me see," she said softly and looked at the fingers. "Not even red." But she dropped a delicate kiss on the tip of his index finger. "But all better. They'll be ready in 15 minutes." 

Merlin smiled, she was nice. He noticed a scent change in the room and looked at Roxy who glared at his fingers and then quickly projected neutral.

And Merlin suddenly clued into everything.

Why everyone had bugged him about this visit.

Why Roxy was being aggressive.

Why this girl made fruit tarts.

The mystery awesome socks.

Roxy had been long distance dating Tilde and had decided to bring her home, to see if they would connect well.

Tilde was trying to impress him as Roxy's pack alpha, trying to find her place in the pack.

And if this was their first face to face visit, Roxy would be nervous, wanting it to go perfect. Roxy always wanted everything perfect.

Well he could help. He wanted his little warriorto be happy. "Let me get a shirt and then we can get to know one another better," Merlin said. "Do you like Mario Kart?" Mario Kart was a good way to tell the measure of a person.

"I admit, I haven't played it before."

Merlin grinned a sharp, feral thing. "Perfect, I'll teach ye." He looked at Roxy. "You playing too?"

Roxy looked torn, she really loved playing games with Merlin. "No, you two play, I had to skip work early and should make a couple calls."

Merlin nodded and went to retrieve his top and when he returned Roxy was gone and Tilde was putting a few fruit tarts on the plate. "Roxy had said these were your favourite, my cook taught me, though I can't guarantee they'll be edible."

Merlin gave her a kind look. She seemed desperate to impress him, like doing that would make Roxy happy. "I am sure they are lovely. Do you make carrot cake? That's Roxy's favourite."

"I will learn before I return home," Tilde said. They took tea and the tarts to the family room. "Wow," she said in awe.

"Aye," Merlin preened just a little. "The pack spends a lot of time in here, so we've outfitted it well. Large but still cozy. Excellent for movie night pack cuddles." Merlin looked at her. "Did Roxy tell you we do cuddle piles a fair bit?"

"No," Tilde looked at him. "You do not seem the cuddle sort."

"I am very cuddly," Merlin said a little affronted.

Tilde laughed at him. He was adorable. And more attractive in person. Not as radiant as Roxy, but still, nice. And for alpha-a, neither smelled gross to Tilde. She wouldn't think about how Roxy's scent was better.

They settled onto the couch and Merlin handed her a controller. He explained the basics and they got to playing. Once she got the hang of it, Tilde was ruthless and doing very well. And the five languages she cursed in when hit with a blue shell caused a low pleased growl to come out of him. She was presenting herself as a prospect for Roxy quite well. Yes, he needed to observe for a few more days before he let Roxy know her girlfriend would be welcomed to the pack. Merlin stared at the castle level they were on and his brain clicked over. "That's how I do that wall!" He took the plate of tarts and just walked away to his home office to work, forgetting about Tilde completely.

Tilde stared after him confused and then shrugged. She settled in to play a few more rounds against the AI.

************************************

"You were supposed to stay in nice clothes," Harry said to Merlin in Merlin's office.

"Ye are supposed to shower after sex," Merlin countered. "I can smell Percival on ye. All over ye."

Percival tried to look innocent where he was standing closer to the door.

"You have to make a good impression on Tilde," Harry sighed in frustration. It was already going wrong. 

"I already made a horrible one, she survived," Merlin said.

"You didn't," Harry picked up an award statue off the wall and went over to bash Merlin's head in. Percival stopped him and put the award back.

"Relax, Tilde seemed amused. And if she wants to be a part of this pack, better she know from the start all of you are insane."

"All of us?" Harry roared and his scent spiked in frustrated anger. "You are the worst. Do you know what this took, how many hours of communication and planning?"

Percival was the only one actually paying attention. "You think she could be a member of the pack?" he asked softly and Harry jolted as he realized that yes Merlin had said that.

"I need more time with her, but aye," Merlin smiled at them. "I am annoyed you didn't truly explain the situation, but it is Harry and a little drama is to be expected. Don't worry, I get what's going on. I'll get to know her, but I think a positive outcome is to be expected."

Harry shouted in glee. "I knew it! Ha, didn't I know it, didn't I say she was perfect. I need to go talk to her myself." Harry hurried out of the room, incredibly pleased with himself.

Percival looked at Merlin. "You liked her that much?"

"Well, it isn't my job to like her, it is my job to make sure she is suitable and she seems as such. Liking her will be a bonus," Merlin nodded. "But yes, she is a good fit, I think. I know people."

Percival didn't react to that rather incredible statement. Something was off here. "Merlin, what is it that you think is going on?"

Merlin grinned. "Don't worry, I'll keep my mouth shut about any big statements, let everything unfold naturally. I have it all well in hand." He looked at his plate with only crumbs left. "I need another fruit tart. Tilde did quite well on them." Merlin left the office.

"Bugger," Percival muttered. This was going to be a horrible mess.


	6. Chapter 6

She couldn't sleep. The house felt different than home, and it carried a different scent with the three alphas and beta that lived in it. The air felt different, the bed too soft. And it was just all new people. She was good with people, she was trained to be, but these were not people. She had no idea what this pack was. They had tried well at dinner, and Roxy's father had truly impeccable manners. Her stepfather, was very eager, and Merlin pouted when he was told he couldn't eat fruit tarts for dinner.

And Tilde was pretty sure that this was them on their best behaviour. She was terrified, and intrigued.

Everyone back home was so...proper. They would have been like Merlin had been, or Roxy. Alpha she knew always tried so hard to impress. And it was always my family, my financial holdings, don't I smell perfect blah blah blah.

These people were potentially insane but real and honest.

She did not think she would regret coming.

Tilde put on a cardigan and belted it tight. She had a couple books but there was a gorgeous library here that Roxy had shown her and she was curious what this pack read. She stepped out a little nervous about walking in the dark but saw a series of night lights that provided just enough illumination. They cast the stars and planets on the ceiling. It was charming. Especially when on in the middle was The Little Mermaid.

She walked down the dark and quiet halls and was going to turn for the library when she got a floor down, but then heard a noise. "Hello?" she called out. There was no response but she heard more noise again. Her father always said her curiosity would be the death of her, but in her experience it tended to be worth it. Tilde went down the hall and the noise grew. The door was open and there was low light.

And the alpha punching a bag rather viciously.

And without a shirt again.

It was a very good look for him.

"Should you be up at this hour punching things?" she asked and screamed and ducked when a knife came flying at her. Maybe they were the wrong sort of insane after all. She wanted Roxy. She heard his footsteps and curled smaller, but then heard him speak into an intercom.

"Roxy, code P," he said.

She heard his footsteps but they were going away. Tilde looked up and scrabbled back until she was against the wall. The knife was sticking out of it. She moved her back up the wall and pulled it out. "Stay away from me," she said, voice shaky and her scent was panicked, animal like.

"I'm staying over here, until Roxy has arrived," Merlin promised as he sat on a bench. "She dinnae warn ye?"

"Warn me what?"

"About Harry and I?"

"The photo of you with the giant knife, sword, thing. It was a joke photo, a prop." Tilde shook her head. "What is wrong with you?"

"A great deal, though less than used to be," Merlin replied. He tilted his head and sighed. "Roxy woke up Harry."

Sure enough Roxy and Harry careened into the room. Roxy went to Tilde and Harry went to Merlin.

Merlin looked at Harry. "I had a nightmare, and came to work it out. Strange voice behind me, and -"

"Reacted instinctively," Harry said and nodded. "Been a long time since a strange voice here at the estate."

"That pup Roxy snuck into her room when she was 17...Owen. You strung him up from the ceiling."

"He shouldn't have run," Harry said. "Come on, need a cuddle?"

"Yeah," Merlin agreed. "It was a dream about El Salvador."

Harry nodded and pulled Merlin up and into a tight hug. They embraced tightly and Harry lead him out.

Roxy tried to project a soothing scent to calm Tilde. Tilde frowned. "Do not, try to soothe me like a child, he threw a knife at me! This knife!" Tilde waved it around. "He is a lunatic!"

Roxy growled. "You do not say that about him," she said.

"What would you call it then?"

"PTSD," Roxy said.

Tilde looked at her. "I'm sorry?"

Roxy went and sat on the bench where Merlin had been. "It isn't my story to tell, but he and Harry have a past. That sometimes causes problems for them, especially if dreams or a situation triggers them. It used to be worse." Roxy gets this look in her eye, a distant gaze, "a lot worse." Her scent grows heavy and upset and Tilde goes to sit beside her. She wraps an arm around Roxy. "I should have warned you, but neither Merlin or Harry has had a problem in well over a year, god almost two now," she said. 

"What should I avoid?" Tilde asked.

"Never let Harry hear the song Freebird, approaching either from behind isn't the best idea, especially if they are lost in something like working out, Merlin isn't allowed to gamble, Harry has ice cream limits. And call for me, and I will protect you."

Tilde leaned into Roxy for just a moment. "If he had a nightmare this bad, perhaps it has not been so long since he had a problem, yes?" Now she let herself be soothed by Roxy's scent but leaned away when it grew angry. "Roxy?"

"Bastard's been lying to us," she snarled. "Oh that son of a -" Roxy got up and stalked off, and Tilde decided not to follow, this was clearly pack business, which meant it was none of hers. She finally made her way to the library and decided she would stay there for a bit after she heard Roxy yell. From a different floor and potentially a different wing. She read a short story in a chair that was quite cozy and finally felt tired enough to sleep. Tilde made her way back upstairs and stopped at her door.

She shouldn't interfere, she really shouldn't check.

Tilde found herself walking down the hall to where Roxy had mentioned the packs suites were. There was a door open and a low light coming from it. She peaked her head in and saw a very large bed.

Merlin was in the middle with Harry big spooning him on one side and Roxy clutching his arm on the other. Percival was on the other side of Roxy but had an arm flung out and the hand was on Merlin's head.

They were a unit, a pack, and in that moment seeing that collection of limbs, Tilde yearned. She went softly in and better adjusted the large quilt over top of them all.

Merlin sleepily opened his eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"It is forgotten," she said.

"You may be one of us," he said already falling back asleep. "We'll see."

"We will," Tilde agreed and went to her room.

But she already knew, this was her family.

This was where she belonged. Maybe she just needed a little weapons training first.


	7. Chapter 7

_Mama, I am bored_

**You've been on vacation for four days**

_And I'm bored_

**Didn't you say their grounds were beautiful**

_Walked them. Walked them all. They are trees. Weeeee_

**Have you told them you want to do something**

_..._

**Darling, they need to know you, stop being a perfect guest and make some demands**

_I don't want to be a bother_

**Darling, you love being a bother. The King sighs when he sees you**  

_Well he should have listened to me I was right_

**Tell them you are bored**

_Fine_

**And don't make that face you'll give yourself frown lines**

_Not making a face_

**Goodbye darling, have fun**

 

****************************************

It was a lovely dinner and she did want to hang out in the family room after but. "I'd like to go into London," Tilde said into a lull in the conversation. Four heads turned and stared at her. "Or not."

"Wait, you haven't been into the city?" Merlin frowned. "Roxy you've been bringing her in and she's been doing museums and tourist shite while we've been working right?" He had been leaving earlier than the rest having a nightmare of time with some of the coding. He and his team had all been pulling crazy hours dealing with glitches. He was only home for dinners and pack time because Harry had made a very credible threat with his favourite knife and Percival had flooded his email with pdf attachments.

Roxy paid close attention to her plate. Harry growled a little. "Are you being a poor host?" he snapped. Roxy was supposed to be talking Merlin up, making Tilde see they were perfect for Tilde. They were friends and Roxy could be matchmaking, dammit.

"Harry," Percival said calmly. "Do be careful, darling." He continued eating. "Roxy, Harry is sorry for getting his timbre up at you. But have you been neglecting Tilde?"

"No," Tilde interjected horrified at how the scents around the table were rising. "No, I told her I was looking forward to quiet. And your grounds have been lovely to walk around. It has been an enjoyable rest."

Merlin looked at Roxy who was still staring at her plate. "Roxy?"

"I meant to bring her in today," Roxy admitted. "But I got a call, and someone cocked up the poster and we are going to take a 20k bath on it, and I had to go yell at people, and sort of forgot Tilde?" 

"How do ye forget a person?" Merlin asked her.

This time everyone stared at Merlin. "Umm, Merlin?" Percival was the brave one. "You forget people all the time. Like all the time. You once left the three of us in a different country."

"Yes! Me!" Merlin shouted. "I'm a fucking idiot when it comes to people. In order of bad peopling it goes me, Harry, Roxy, Percival. So logically Roxy is unlikely to forget a person."

"How am I worse than Dad? I'm in marketing! He's an accountant. He deals with numbers, I actually do interviews and promos and people all the fucking time, why am I ranked worse than him?" Roxy let loose an indigent growl and her scent was definitely up and Tilde did not lean into it.

"I know the answer to this one!" Harry said gleefully. "You are worse than your father, because he never threatens anyone not in the pack. You once told a dudebro journalist who made a crack about the diversity in our games to go find a belt sander and use it on his useless dick because that was the most action his pathetic knot would ever get and that if he had a problem with us putting women and people of colour in our games he was welcome to meet you in the back alley to talk about it more personally where you would bash his head in so thoroughly he would fall into a coma and dream of living in the 1880s where in the dream he would die in agony of malaria just as alone and pathetic in his own fantasy as he would die in real life."

"That is...very specific," Tilde said, both impressed and horrified. And she could swear that she smelled pride off someone at the table. She looked at them and realized it came from Merlin. "You are proud of that, your marketing staff probably lost you sales."

"I gave her a raise when the video of that went viral," Merlin said fondly. "Though, to be fair, someone has been lax on their upper body workout and likely couldn't bash his head in with her fists."

"I have Papa's cricket bat in my office, don't I?" Roxy snapped. "And fuck you, not all of us have your shoulders and I kick better than you any day. Wanna go old man?"

"Yes," Merlin said immediately and soon the two were running towards the gym.

"And that is why I am first on the not forgetting people list," Percival said and drank some wine. He could feel Harry quivering beside him. "Oh go play with them," he said and Harry kissed his head and took off running.

"Don't start without me!" Harry shouted stripping his suit off.

Percival kept eating and was clearly lost in his own head.

Tilde sat there awkwardly. "So...can I go into the city tomorrow?"

Percival looked at her. "Of course, you've been able to go the whole time. Roxy gave you a car for your days."

"No she didn't," Tilde said.

Percival put his cutlery down. "Excuse me?"

Tilde shrugged helpless.

"You had the welcome package I prepared for you. Keys to one of the cars, an oyster card for the underground, map, prepaid tickets to the 10 best museums in London. A cash card for meals. And of course the 5 page summation about why it would be to your advantage to join our pack?"

"No, I never received this."

Percival nodded and wiped his mouth with his napkin. He stood and gave her a small bow. "If you excuse me," he said calmly. He took off his jacket and placed it carefully on the back of the chair and just yelled, "Roxanne Elizabeth Morton Hart!" It reverberated through the house and he stalked off to follow through on the threat of the usage of a full name.

Tilde finished the food and wondered if the pack ever actually properly finished a meal. Well she wasn't doing the dishes. She was going to play more Mario Kart. Eventually they all came into the family room, mussed and blood up, and smelling happy and Roxy was carrying a box which she thrust at Tilde with an apologetic smile. "You were so beautiful it made me forget this. I'm sorry."

Tilde flushed a little at the compliment and worried that maybe Merlin would misconstrue what Roxy meant. She was just being friendly and welcoming. Tilde looked at Merlin and waited for the alpha to make a more dramatic compliment.

"You have funny looking toes," Merlin said, "but are attractive enough."

"Wow, no wonder they had to -" Tilde began and Harry had a coughing fit to drown out the rest of her words. Tilde was confused, but then this group confused her a great deal. But she was never bored when she was with them. Harry picked a movie and they all settled in.

***************************************

Tilde drove the Fiat into the city by herself and hummed happily. She parked at Kingsman games because free parking in the city was not to be overlooked. She used the oyster card and the free museum tickets and took a bunch of photos and it was good, but all she could think was how much more fun this would be if she had one of the others with her. She wasn't even sure if she was picky, Tilde was rather enjoying the whole pack.

But maybe Roxy could take a break.

She went back to Kingsman and went to the desk and showed them her pass and asked where Roxy's office was. She was giving directions and was going to go, when she noticed the nervous young man sitting there in too big a suit. He reeked, an omega in distress.

Tilde went and sat beside him. "Hello," she said softly, her own scent soothing, and calm. "What's wrong?"

"I am here for an interview," he said. Oh the sweet little pup, Tilde thought. "But I've sat here for two hours, and no one has fetched me and what if I missed my time and they don't want me, or they forgot me, or this is a power tactic, but all the books said that those don't last longer than 15 minutes and I've dreamed of working here for ten years and I know I don't have the strongest portfolio but I'm a good writer and just..." he hung his head.

"You are a writer," she said encouragingly. He nodded glumly. "Tell me a plot thing you would fix in one of their old games."

"Oh, no their games are perfect," he said earnestly.

"Bullshit, they are great but flawed," Tilde countered. "It took them an expansion to fix Jax."

The boy's eyes lit up. "Oh man, okay, so here is what I would do," he said and began to ramble and Tilde listened carefully. He was really quite clever and while he gestured, she took the small portfolio out of his lap and looked at his resume. It was pretty solid for one so young. 

"Right, let's fix this, come along," she said. She took up and started walking. He didn't follow, terrified. "Pup, come along."

"But they haven't called me."

"They fucked up, and I dislike that," Tilde said. She went to the front desk and asked something. She was denied and put on her most imperious face. "The location please," she sneered and was given the information. "Pup, follow," she ordered and he gulped and followed her. They walked through the offices and Tilde was on a mission and ignored everyone until she knocked on a door.

"What? I'm busy," the voice called.

Tilde didn't care and opened the door. "You can take fifteen minutes," she said.

"Oh shit that's Logan Mathe," the boy said in terror, in awe.

"Did you pick up a stray on your adventure?" Merlin asked. He sniffed and jesus the boy smelled bad, and Tilde determined.

"Your human resources, left this poor boy sitting in the lobby for two hours!" Tilde said. "That is unacceptable Merlin. I know you are a moron, but this is no way to run a company. I don't care if he is young, you treat everyone who walks through your doors with respect."

"We do!" Merlin said. "Or I thought we did. They generally don't let me near new hires. When did we hire you lad?"

"You haven't sir," the boy stammered. "I was here for an interview."

"Huh," Merlin said and picked up his phone. He made a call and spoke softly before hanging up. "Seems food poisoning hit HR and half of them are out. And ye fell through the cracks."

"Oh well that is understandable," the boy said, his scent evening out a little.

"It is not!" Tilde argued. "I don't care if half were out, you need HR to be a well oiled machine if it is even down to one person! Pathetic."

"The head of HR retired a few months ago and we have not been satisfied with our internal or external search. No one can -"

"No one can handle the idiotic president, head of creative development, head of marketing, or head of accounting, yes?" Tilde asked. "No one has enough backbone to deal with you?"

"Pretty much," he agreed. "We hired a woman and broke her in a week."

"I am fixing your department so they can run until you find someone suitable," Tilde said. "I hate waste of resources. And you just hired this boy to your writing team."

"I did?" Merlin frowned. "Doesn't he need to be interviewed?"

"I did an informal one, and he is what Harry's team needs, they are too entrenched. He has interesting ideas and a good resume. He is hired."

"Fine," Merlin said. "Kid, go down one floor and hang a left and the third door is Harry Hart. Tell him to find you a cubicle."

"Thank you sir?" the boy asked.

"Are you asking or saying?"

The kid tried to look grown up. "Saying."

"Good, go on." Merlin raised a brow and the boy scurried out of the office. He and Tilde looked at each other. "What do you know about HR?"

"I have a degree in it, and ran it for the largest national children's charity in Sweden." She stuck out her jaw at him.

He pointed to the sofa in his office. "Sit." 

Tilde sat.

He came over with a spare lap top. He typed a little. "Ye have temporary access to HR's systems. Take a look." He went back to his computer and began to work and ignore her.

"This is a mess!" she shouted. "How are you even running right now?"

"I don't know, we just do."

"Ugh," she said and began to type.

Merlin smiled at her as she continued to curse them out. "So I take it when ye move here we are putting you in HR then?"

"I have agreed to nothing yet. We don't know if we really suit do we?"

"I think we suit well enough," Merlin said dismissively.

"Do you?" she looked at him. "I am not so sure yet. I like you Merlin, but I don't know yet if we are...truly compatible."

Merlin was a little confused by that and just shrugged. "Well, let me know when you figure it out."

Tilde lost herself in the work. This was much better than paintings of dead people any day. She definitely was not bored. She stared at a file. "You moron! You have 3 people on medical leave and their paperwork is all wrong! They have not been getting the correct pay."

"So fix it, and leave me alone," Merlin snarled.

"Fine, I will," she snapped back.

They didn't even notice Harry and Roxy at the door. "See, she can handle him," he whispered. He had come down after the terrified pup had made his way to the department.

Roxy frowned. "I need a donut," she muttered and stomped off, pissed at how seamlessly Tilde was fitting in with Merlin.


	8. Chapter 8

"You don't have to do this, you know," Roxy said as she and Tilde walked into Kingsman. Tilde had gone shopping and bought a few things to make herself more office appropriate and Roxy was dying at the cute blazer and Tilde's hair up, showing her pretty neck. Fuck Roxy wanted to bite it.

If Tilde put a tie on, she'd be done for.

And for the first time, she fully understood why Harry talked about seeing her dad in the tie. She got it, she got it so hard.

"This is fun!" Tilde replied happily.

"Fixing a company's human resource department is fun?"

"I'm being truly useful," Tilde was earnest, and her scent was so content. "At home, I was...I was useful enough and at specific times, but it...chafed. Here, I feel productive and wanted."

"You are very wanted," Roxy whispered. "But you haven't had much time with Merlin."

"We have at home," Tilde dismissed. She looked at Roxy whose scent spiked with hunger, with want. Tilde looked around to see if someone where there, but it was just them. "Roxy?"

"You called it home," Roxy said.

Tilde blushed a bit. "The estate is very comfortable, and welcoming."

"That's good," Roxy said. They stood in the hall and stared at each other.

"Roxy, a word?" Harry asked when he came upon them. He sniffed the air and frowned. He should be able to figure out what it was, but he couldn't.

"Sure, Harry," Roxy agreed. "Lunch, Tilde?"

"Not today," Tilde said. "Merlin and I are meeting for that. You could come."

"Yeah!" Roxy agreed and winced when Harry kicked. "Or not, just remembered, lunch meeting."

"Okay," Tilde gave them a little wave and went to the office she had stolen.

Harry grabbed Roxy's arm and dragged her to her office. "What the hell are you doing?"

"What?" Roxy pulled her arm away and growled a little at Harry and he growled right back. They stared at each other, neither wanting to back down.

"You are supposed to be helping Merlin!" Harry said.

"I am," Roxy protested.

"By going to their date?"

"He's worse than usual right now with people, I'm just helping smooth the process!" Roxy shouted. She decided to try to deflect. "You're the one causing the problems!"

"Me? I never cause the problem!" Harry was affronted. "I am a romance god and I am helping Merlin with that lovely woman!"

"You are pushing too much, they clearly like each other," and fuck did that hurt. "And you know how Merlin gets when you decide you know his needs better than him."

Harry opened his mouth ready to yell and stopped. "You might have a point."

"Damn right I do," Roxy said, nodding.

Harry deflated a little and went to a chair. "Roxy, I just want him to be happy. He gives everything to us. Everything. And he deserves so much."

Roxy sat down. "Yeah, he does." She had to remember that. She had promised long ago to never take from Merlin, to honour him, and what she was feeling didn't do that. "You were right though, they should do lunch alone."

"I'll buy you some chips," Harry said and smiled. "We'll sneak some ice cream."

She grinned back at him, and it wasn't completely forced. "Sure."

Harry kissed her head and went back to his office.

************************************

"Percival," Tilde smiled. "Excellent. You can help me make sense of this."

"Perhaps," he agreed and sat across from her. "You have really made this space yours, haven't you?" There are flowers on a corner table, a couple cheap art prints on the wall. "It's nice."

"I know it is a temporary thing," Tilde said. "But Merlin said if I was going to take a space, I might as well take a space."

Percival watched her. "Would you like to keep taking space with us?"

Tilde bit her lip. "I am seriously considering it." She frowned when he didn't look happy. "Is that...do you not want me to take space?" She thought the man liked her, they had a fair bit in common, but maybe he was being polite.

"I just want you to make sure that you are taking the right space," he said.

"I don't understand."

"None of us do, and we'll have to sort that, very soon I think," Percival replied. "But for now, what is the problem? Shouldn't the people in this department be able to help you?"

"You'd think that, but I just get these shrugs and 'well that is just the way it is here'" Tilde rolled her eyes. Her scent was incredibly exasperate and also a little fond. "How this place hasn't collapsed astonishes me."

Percival laughed. "A thought I have every quarter when Harry demands I increase his budget. We need a firm hand in charge of this department, I need the back up."

"We shall see, at the very least I will have it running smoothly. Now why are there 3 Freds and yet only one file?"

"Sadly only 2 Freds now, one died of cancer two years ago. But it is so entrenched we still call them the three Freds. It is our legal department." Percival explained the Freds and told Tilde the story of their involvement in his and Harry's courtship and she giggled at it all. They went over a few other things and then she pulled up the last thing that was utterly confusing in the system.

"Carol Burnbaum," she said. "I cannot even begin to figure out why she is still on payroll at 25% salary and yet not working here? But there is no medical disability and there is just this note that says "NO ONE TOUCHES MY CAROL. Explain?"

"She was hired roughly the same time as me," Percival said. "She left the job here last year because she got a wonderful opportunity at Bioware Montreal."

"So why is she still being paid?" Tilde asked.

"Because Harry believes he can entice her home when her contract ends in 2 years. He has even kept her office the same," Percival shook his head. "My mate is very possessive. He knew this was too good an opportunity for her, but keeps hoping she'll return to the flock. Please don't adjust the files on her. It is mostly paid out of his personal funds."

"You are a very odd bunch, but it seems to work. Your employees work satisfaction is disproportionately high, you actually are a diverse company, not just say it. How is it even possible?"

"Because Harry and Merlin are certifiably insane, but in a way that makes people happy?" Percival shrugged. "There is no way to explain it, they just suck you in. And then eventually it is all Alice."

"Alice?"

"In Wonderland. We're all mad here," he laughed. "I used to be completely normal and boring, and then Harry and I fell in love."

"I doubt you were ever boring," she said. "Sensible. But they need that."

"Is that what you bring to us, more sensibility? It is needed," Percival said.

Tilde paused. "I don't know what I bring to you." She bit her lip. "I...I bring me," is all she could say.

"The alphas in the pack are some of the strongest you will ever meet," Percival's scent grew as strong as it could for the beta. He wanted to make his point plain. "But I do not want you to make the mistake of thinking that the heart you carry in your hands isn't fragile, doesn't need to be protected."

Tilde couldn't understand. "We are still getting to know each other. I know I do not hold Merlin's heart."

"I didn't say it was his," Percival stood up. "Be kind." He gave her a nod and left.

Tilde sat quietly in the office and stared at the wall until she was to meet Merlin.

********************************

"I don't think I can ever love you," she blurted out to Merlin as he opened his fridge to get them lunch. 

Merlin looked at her. "Like at all?"

"No," she said sadly. Her scent was so upset that he automatically went over to comfort her. He nuzzled her neck, tried to let his scent soothe her. She leaned in a bit. He smelled so comforting, a promise of shelter. God she wished she could love him as he deserved. She wanted to stay.

She needed to leave.

"Well," he said slowly. "I didn't think loving me was strictly necessary?" he tilted her face up. "Percival doesn't love me. I don't think. He and I don't talk about it much. I do assume though the pdfs that are just for me are a sign of great affection."

"Yes, but that's different. I like you, Merlin, a great deal -" she began.

He smiled. "Yes, I like you too. And I think you are a perfect fit." He nuzzled her again.

And Tilde realized that he was nuzzling the pack side, not the mating side. "You do not think of me sexually, do you?" she said with a dawning realization.

Merlin leaned back and looked at her. "No, of course not," he said. And he realized she was worried what kind of pack they were. He wanted to reassure her, for Roxy. He wanted his little warrior to have everything, to have the mate she was meant for. "I will never think of ye in a sexual manner. I swear that. I will offer pack leader comfort if it were absolutely necessary, but it would be out of concern and affection and never lust or passion." He gave her a solemn nod, sure it would help.

"Why not? What's wrong with me, is it my scent?" Tilde asked. She felt oddly offended no matter that she had zero attraction to Merlin herself.

"Huh?" Merlin was lost.

"What is wrong with me that you wouldn't want to fuck me? I'm great in bed!"

"Because ye aren't mine, I can't think of ye like that, you aren't in that part of my brain. Also these days I mostly like guys?"

"Do they know that?" she asked.

"Why wouldn't they?" Merlin frowned.

Tilde laughed hysterically and her scent changed to something he couldn't understand. She ran out of the room laughing and crying.

Merlin wondered what to do. Well whatever it was, this was Roxy's mate so Roxy could fix it. He sent a text and got back to work.

*********************************

"Tilde!" Roxy got the text in time to look out her window and see Tilde leave the building, and had run to catch up. "Tilde, what did Merlin do? Whatever it was, I can fix. Promise."

"I don't want it fixed," Tilde said. "He and I don't suit."

"You can!" Roxy protested. "You need to give it more time. You two haven't even been on a proper date. I know we can" Roxy couldn't finish the sentence because all of a sudden Tilde's mouth was on hers. Roxy sank into the kiss for a moment. It was a perfect kiss. Sublime, and the scent of Tilde surrounded her and all she wanted to do was claim and never let go.

She brain flashed the memory of her promising never to dishonour Merlin during her first rut. Roxy pushed Tilde away. She wiped her mouth. "Do not ever do that again."

Tilde's eyes swam. "But, you are the one I -"

"No," Roxy said, and her scent went from lustful to rejecting in a second. "Whatever you are thinking just stop. How dare you do this? How can you be this person?"

"Me?" Tilde looked at her and shook her head. "Because I am the only one who feels this between us?"

Roxy firmed her jaw. "There is nothing between us."

Tilde looked at Roxy, begged with her eyes, but Roxy stood there coldly. "No, I guess you are right. There is nothing." Tilde turned and walked away.

Roxy's growl and scent when Tilde couldn't be seen any longer was enough to scare the dozens of people walking by her.

She felt her father behind her and let him wrap his arms around her and nuzzle her. "This has been a rather impressive cock up, even for us."

"Daddy," she whispered, broken.

"Come on, give her a little space and then we'll get it all sorted." Percival kissed his daughter's head. "Promise, honey."

But when they went to the estate there was no Tilde and a sword sticking a note to Roxy's door that simply said  _Fuck You Very Much_.

"She's perfect," Roxy said. "And I can't have her." She collapsed to the ground and sobbed.

Percival gathered his daughter in his arms and rocked her like he had when she was a child.


	9. Chapter 9

Merlin went to the kitchen starving. He went to the box that Tilde had been keeping filled with fruit tarts and it was empty. Dammit. He looked at the clock. Hmmm, 11pm. Not that late. Right. He looked at himself and was relieved that he was dressed enough to go knock on Tilde's door. He whistled as he went upstairs. He figured it would be fine to ask her to bake. Plus they could talk out that very weird conversation they had at lunch today.

He blinked but wasn't overly concerned with the sword attached to Tilde's door, not like the first time that had happened here. What did concern him though was Harry pacing in front of the door and smelling ranking.

Merlin moved swiftly over and pulled him into a hug. "Sit rep," he said and nuzzled Harry's pack bite. "We'll get it sorted, Harry. Promise."

"I fucked up so hard," Harry said. "And my pup is in there crying her eyes out."

"Where's Percival?" Merlin asked.

"In there with Roxy." Harry sniffed against Merlin. "I just wanted my pack happy."

"Is Tilde in there? She'll get Roxy sorted, they are mates."

Harry stepped back from Merlin. "What?" he said blankly.

"What, what?" Merlin frowned. "If Roxy is upset about something, why isn't Tilde helping her?"

Harry looked at Merlin. "Merlin, they aren't mates," he said slowly.

Merlin waved a hand. "Well no, Roxy hasn't bit her yet, they haven't made me to the formal offer to join the pack stuff. But like I said I figured it out. Roxy had been long distance dating Tilde and this was their visit to make sure they were compatible, make sure Tilde fit the pack well. Which clearly she did. I had assumed we were a week or two away from getting it all sorted." Harry stepped back to the wall and sank to the floor. Merlin was getting very concerned and crouched in front of him. "Harry?"

Harry's eyes were swimming and his scent was devastated. "Roxy loved Tilde?"

Merlin was confused. "Well I thought so, she certainly looked like you did when you were first besotted with Percival that dopey grin and happy scent. And I was impressed she didn't seem to be cocking it up as much as you did."

Harry nodded, "she did didn't she?" Harry looked at Merlin. "Tilde is gone."

"But fruit tarts!" Merlin said.

"That is your concern?" Harry shouted.

"Well she would have had to go home at some point, organize her wardrobe and whatnot to be sent here, right?" Merlin asked. His scent took a dive. "Wait, my little warrior isn't moving to Sweden is she?" His heart broke at the thought of his girl leaving home like that.

"Tilde left," Harry said. "Like left left. Gone forever."

"It's not my fault," Merlin said swiftly. He paused. "I don't think." He nodded. "Get up, we need to get this sorted." Harry didn't move, just stayed on the ground, smelling like despair. Merlin hauled him up and they went into the room. Which smelled even worse.

And there was his little warrior curled into a tiny ball.

Merlin ran to the bed and climbed on and pulled her in tight and began scenting her. He looked at Percival who looked helpless. "Shh, little warrior I'm here. We'll fix this."

"I'm sorry, Merlin. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Roxy kept repeating over and over. She sobbed it into his neck. 

Merlin rubbed her back, tried to calm her down.

Percival's hand met Merlin's on Roxy and he gave Merlin a small squeeze. "You've done nothing wrong, darling," Percival said. Merlin had a feeling he had said it many times.

"I have dishonoured the pack," Roxy said.

Merlin's eyes widened in shock at that. He looked at Percival who was focused on his daughter and then to Harry who had come to sit on the bed.

"No, that was me, with all my plans," Harry replied.

Merlin was lost. "You helped Roxy plan Tilde's visit? I thought Percival would have done that. He's our planner."

"I did, but it was Harry's...idea," Percival said.

"Why wouldn't it have been Roxy's?" Merlin asked.

"I'm sorry?" Percival asked.

"Well, why wouldn't it have been Roxy's idea to have her potential mate visit the pack?" Merlin asked. The room was very quiet, even Roxy's sobs had stopped.

"Potential mate?" Percival looked at Harry who gave a weak smile.

Roxy leaned a little away from Merlin. "I'm so sorry Merlin."

"Little warrior, you can fix it, I am sure."

"I can't. I tried to get her to fall in love with you, I did, I swear," Roxy pleaded.

"Is this a Swedish thing?" Merlin asked all of them. "Because she said that too and I don't get it. Percival doesn't love me." Merlin looked at him. "You don't do you?"

"In a brotherly way I hold you in the dearest affection," Percival said.

"Exactly!" Merlin pointed. "So I don't get why to be your mate, and a part of the pack, everyone keeps thinking she had to love me. We liked each other, and I would die to protect her since she would be pack and mate to my girl, and damn she can make a fruit tart. That is definitely worth killing people. But why do we have to love each other?"

The three stared at him. "My mate?" Roxy asked.

"Yes," Merlin said. "And now that we are getting this all sorted, why didn't ye tell me that you were doing online dating? I would have been supportive. And I mean clearly Tilde is perfect for you. So was it pack nerves or something that caused the tiff? I know ye have never had an omega in heat? Scared about that? Did she want ye to move to Sweden? I don't like it, but give us six months and we can all move there." Merlin looked at Roxy who had an unreadable look on her face. "Little Warrior?"

"I told her I didn't want her," Roxy said softly.

Merlin growled low and deep and Roxy tilted her head in submission. Merlin gave her arse a sharp smack. "Why would you tell your perfect match that you dinnae want her?" he shouted. "When the fuck did ye become a bloody coward?" He growled again and all three of their heads tilted to him. "You are going to fix this mess."

"I don't know how," Roxy said.

"Fucking hell, how could you cock this up so much? You are worse than Harry!" Merlin told her.

"That's rather mean," Percival said mildly.

"But true," Harry said. "She is actually worse than me at this."

Percival made a noise low in his throat and Harry ducked his head. "The circumstances were different and you know it."

Merlin frowned. "I'm missing something. I know it."

"It is of no consequence," Harry said quickly. Now was definitely not the time for the truth to fully come out. "Roxy, darling, do you love Tilde?"

Roxy nodded. "I really really do. Or I think I do. I was trying so hard not to."

"Well that's fucking stupid, why would you run from love?" Merlin asked.

"Because I didn't want to shame you," Roxy said. 

"On what planet would you falling in love bring anything but joy to me and the pack?" Merlin asked. "Tilde is sweet and fixed HR and can make fruit tarts, and she looked at you like you were the best, which you are. And you looked at her like -" Merlin quieted.

"Like what?"

"Like how Harry looks at your father. With hope and the belief that everything good and wonderful in the universe can be seen in them." Merlin smiled. "Why wouldn't I want ye to have that."

"But I want that for you," Roxy said. "You deserve that too."

"And perhaps one day, I'll meet the right man, and it will happen. But now is about you."

"Man?" all three said.

Merlin looked at them. "Well, yes. My last five shags have been blokes. Ye know I've had a strong preference for male omegas for the last few years."

Percival gave Harry a look. "We are talking later."

Harry sighed. "I'll look foward to it." He was not looking forward to it.

"i can have Tilde?" Roxy looked at Merlin. "You aren't upset?"

"Well I am upset at the fact that you have clearly fucked up a sure thing, and I can't promise you can have Tilde. That rather depends on Tilde. But if she takes your dumb ass back, I will happily accept her into the pack," Merlin swore.

"I love you," Roxy whispered.

"I love you too. Harry strip and get in the bed. We all need a cuddle and we'll get this sorted in the morning." Merlin hugged Roxy tight. Percival moved closer so that Roxy was surrounded and Harry spooned his mate. Roxy's scent began to soften, and her body relax.

"Merlin, would you really move us all to Sweden? Just for me?" Roxy asked.

"Don't be stupid. I'd move us to the moon for you." Merlin thought about it. "Oh god, Harry a moon base!"

Harry's eyes widen. "For the -"

"Yes and if we -"

"Only if we change -"

"Yes and add the -"

"Shit, it's perfect. I need my markers." Harry kissed Percival's head and Merlin kissed Roxy's and they were both gone.

"I can get them back," Percival said to his daughter.

"No. Just you right now is good," she said. She snuggled into her father. "Do you think I can fix this?"

"You can do anything, my darling."

"How did we not know Merlin was liking boys these days?"

"Well, for incredibly smart people, we are morons. And have been infected with Merlin lack of awareness."

"He was smart enough to figure out Tilde and I."

"Perhaps we should give our alpha more credit," Percival said biting back a smile.

Roxy tried not to, but couldn't help laughing. "Oh god, Merlin was the one to figure it out. Fucking Merlin saw the truth. It is the end times."

Percival laughed as well. "I am pretty sure it will have been a one off. I doubt he has someone gained a deal with people capability out of nowhere."

"I am going to fix this, if I can."

"I know, darling," Percival kissed her head. "I know. I'll book us all tickets to Sweden."

"Thanks, Daddy."

"You are welcome."

****************************

Tilde was lying on her bed, her mother cuddling her. "I don't feel good Mama," she said.

"A broken heart hurts a great deal," she replied.

Tilde shook her head. "No, not like that. I don't feel well."

Her mother felt her forehead which was warm. "A fever?"

Tilde moaned as a cramp hit her. "Mama," she pleaded.

It took them a minute to figure it out. Tilde was sliding towards a heat.

"But your drugs," her mother said. 

"I forgot a couple," Tilde said.

"Oh no, oh my sweet one," her mother held her close. "We'll get you through."

Tilde wiped away a tear. "I don't want to be in heat, Mama. I hate it."

"I know, sweet one, I know."

Tilde cuddled close into her mother. 

She hated her heats, hated feeling so omega-y.

And she really hated how much her body wanted an alpha.

And that she had a name, a person.

She hated that soon she'd be screaming for Roxy.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so last chapter for pain and then things are going to get better.  
> But please be advised: DUB CON OF THE A/B/O UNIVERSE VARIETY. Tilde is in heat in this chapter and things are going to happen that outside an a/b/o context would be problematic. Roxy does not have sex with Tilde but things of a sexual nature almost happen (you can consider what happens in this chapter to be similar to what happens between merlin and roxy during her first rut when she was 14 in good families don't if that helps you any)

"Roxy?"

"Yeah, Merlin?"

"That looks like a castle," he said. The four of them were in a rental car and staring at the gates.

"It does," she replied.

"Did you forget to tell us something about Tilde?"

"Nope, I would have mentioned a freaking castle," Roxy answered. "I just had her address, it doesn't say Tilde lives in a castle."

Harry looked at it. "It isn't the royal palace," he commented. "So you know, that's something?"

"Perhaps we should hit the intercom there?" Percival asked. "It seems Tilde had an interesting secret."

"Right," Merlin agreed. He opened the window and leaned out to press the button. "Hello? I'm Logan Mathe of Kingsman Games, and the whole Mathe pack is here to make apologies to Tilde. May we come in."

"The family is not accepting visitors at this time. Call their social secretary and make an appointment."

Merlin tried again. "It is very important that we speak to Tilde, and clear up a horrible misunderstanding."

"The family is not accepting visitors at this time, be gone or security will come and remove you." There was a crackle and a pause and then a woman's voice came through. "Is the alpha Roxy with you?"

Merlin looked at Roxy and then responded. "Aye, she is. It is myself, alpha of the pack. Roxy, and her father, and his husband. The whole of the pack."

Everything went quiet and then the giant gates began to open. The scent in the car was tense and worried as Merlin drove them up the lane. They stopped at the main door where a man was waiting. The four got out of the car and followed him into the castle. They were lead to a formal sitting room where there was an older woman and man and a couple of servants along the wall.

"Hello, I'm Logan Mathe," Merlin said.

"You do not show proper respect? Not a good start," the man said. 

Merlin barely stopped the growl that was low in his throat. "I was perfectly polite."

Harry moved a little to the front and gave a bow. "I do apologize, Merlin did not recognize you." He made a gesture and Percival bowed and Roxy curtsied. Merlin barely inclined his head, not liking the scent off the man. 

"I don't get it," Roxy whispered.

"This gentleman is the brother of the King of Sweden, fourth in line to the throne," Harry told her.

"My Tilde is a princess?" Roxy asked in shocked.

"She is not yours," the woman said sharply. She stood up and walked over and very regally slapped Roxy across the face. She said something in Swedish and hit Roxy again.

In a blink Percival had his daughter behind him and Merlin and Harry both had weapons out. The servants at the back were guards and also pulled out their weapons.

"You do not hit a member of my pack," Merlin growled low and deep, an angry terrifying sound, and his scent went from affable to dangerous in a blink. Harry didn't say anything but his scent matched Merlin's.

Percival looked at the woman. "Ma'am, I understand that you are mad. Your daughter came to us in good faith, and we broke her trust. We have come to make amends, but that does not suggest we will let you hurt us."

"I will kill all of you," Merlin swore. 

"You haven't actually killed that many," Harry pointed out.

"I will order you to kill them all," Merlin replied.

"Yes, that works much better," Harry smiled. "Much more in our wheelhouse."

"Madman," Tilde's mother hissed and her guards moved forward.

"I'm sorry," Roxy said quietly from behind her father. Hers was the only alpha scent that wasn't enraged. She smelled sad.

"Why?" the prince asked. "And everyone, for heaven's sake, put the knots away. Guards, stand down," he ordered. The guards wouldn't budge. He sighed. "They won't move while weapons are drawn on the royal family. Please."

Percival put a hand on Harry's neck, not daring to touch Merlin. Harry relented and put his weapon away. He leaned in and nuzzled Merlin and whispered a little bit. Merlin reluctantly put his away as well.

"How did you even travel with guns?" the prince asked.

"MI-6, created special dispensation for us," Merlin replied.

"That was not in the information packet you sent us," he said.

"Yeah, well, Tilde didn't say she was a bloody princess did she?" Merlin said.

"No, I suppose not," the prince smiled. "Sit, we will all be civil."

"I won't!" Tilde's mother snapped. "Our daughter is upstairs in the middle of a heat that she doesn't want and is crying, begging for one who broke her heart."

Roxy made for the door and her father stopped her. "Tilde needs me," Roxy shouted.

"No, she doesn't," Percival said firmly. "She might be in pain, and calling for you, but that isn't...it is the heat talking. And if you go to her now, she would welcome you, beg for you. And when it was over she would despise you. And any hopes you have to court her, to be her mate would be ruined."

"You expect to court her after you shame her?" the prince asked. "And I thought she was being courted by that one?" he pointed to Merlin.

Merlin looked around the room. "Me?" Harry was looking at the ceiling, and Roxy kept trying for the door. "Oh, no, apparently there has been some weird mix up? The information you were given about me was to assure you that the pack could provide. Weird, usually Percival's documents are perfectly laid out. But I mean I am sure you know that Tilde and Roxy are perfect for each other, Roxy's moment of fear notwithstanding."

"Fear?" the prince asked.

"Well, it is for life isn't it? And Roxy has dated before, but never someone that could be home, be one of us. Most don't like us, get us. Tilde fit perfectly though." Merlin smiled. "She's lovely and made our HR department smooth as silk in just a few days. And the fruit tarts -"

"Focus," Harry coughed. He could see that Tilde's mother was furious, but oddly her father seemed to be relenting.

"My daughter is young," Percival said breaking in. "She is a young alpha-a, who got overwhelmed by meeting her perfect mate. She froze and was cruel, for reasons that are for her to explain to Tilde alone. If Tilde were to give her the chance, Roxy would not freeze again."

"Tilde was not entirely honest with you," the prince said.

"Don't," his wife warned.

"Tilde is biologically omega, but prefers to be treated as beta," he continued. "She takes drugs to change her scent, and block her heats, she made a mistake and didn't take them all the time with you, and they are sensitive enough it triggered her heat." He looked at Roxy. "What do you say to this?"

"Like I give a fuck," Roxy growled, pissed off. "She's Tilde, she has funny looking toes -"

"Thank you!" Merlin muttered and Harry elbowed him.

"She wears clothes that are a bit boring, and has shitty taste in music and great taste in movies. She kicks my ass at Mario Kart and no one kicks my ass at Mario Kart. She makes me smile and makes me hungry, and god hurting her felt like carving out my own heart and I regretted it the second I did it." Roxy's eyes were swimming. "I want her to forgive me, I want a chance to court her, but if she spits in my face and tells me to fuck off, I will wish her all the happiness in the world and take the pack and go home."

"You'll find someone else easily enough," Tilde's mother said. "A young, beautiful alpha like you, they'll come running."

"We don't work like that," Roxy said. "I'm like my pack mates. Like Harry. There is only one for me. Tilde tells me to shove off, I will. But that doesn't mean I'll get over her. She's my mate, whether or not she is ever my mate."

Everyone was ready to keep arguing, when there was a knock on the door. 

A maid poked her head in. "Ma'am, we need to call a doctor, she is..."

Roxy couldn't think, the maid carried the scent of Tilde, she bolted for the door, years of running making her faster than everyone else. She let animal instinct take over and followed the trail of scent. She could hear footsteps behind her and didn't care. Tilde was hurting and she could help. She ran upstairs and turned a corner and the scent got stronger. She ran so fast that she just slammed through the door. "Oh baby, my heart." 

Tilde was on her bed, sheets soaked with sweat and slick, and she was crying, sobbing. There were knotting dildos on the bed and it just smelled wrong.

"Baby, I'm here."

"Roxy?" Tilde said, wrung out from pain. "It hurts, alpha."

Roxy approached the bed and climbed on top of Tilde. "I'm here, I'm here, I'm so sorry, baby, I'm so sorry."

"I hate you so fucking much," Tilde said. She looked up at Roxy and tilted her neck. "Please, please Roxy make it up to me and bite me."

Roxy couldn't resist and started to lower her head. She cursed and growled as she was thrown across the room. 

"Harry, Percival, the door," Merlin snarled. Harry closed the door and the two men stood guard.

"That's my mate," Roxy roared. "You said it, you can't stop my claim now when she asks for it." She growled and jumped at Merlin, but no matter how much he and Harry had trained her, she couldn't defeat Merlin. They rolled around on the ground and snarled and snapped at each other as Tilde cried on the bed.

Eventually Merlin had Roxy pinned and when she fought, he pulled her arm back enough that another inch would snap bone. "Submit," he growled. "Submit, or I will never let ye see Tilde again."

Roxy tapped the ground and Merlin twisted to release the pressure and pick her up. He kept himself between Roxy and Tilde. "Get down to your pants, alpha," he said. He turned and picked Tilde up. "Princess, our pack princess, forgive us for hurting you."

"I need Roxy," Tilde begged.

"I know ye do, and you'll have a bit of her," Merlin promised. He scent the pack side and Tilde was soothed a little bit. He looked over and Roxy was down just to the boxer briefs she wore, that she had worn since she was 14, a replica of Merlin's. "Sit on that chaise," he ordered. Roxy sat and he carried Tilde over and put her gently in Roxy's lap. "Scent her, comfort her, do not bite or touch breasts or nethers, or I'll break the fingers that do so."

"Nethers?"

"Shut up and do it," Merlin growled and Roxy cuddled Tilde close. 

Merlin went over and stripped the bed sheets, setting the toys on the night stand. He took the bundle to the door, where there was quite an audience. "Non penetrative alpha care and comfort," he told the group. "I will stay, and make sure Roxy doesn't step over the line, but Tilde needs an alpha presence, and ye know it."

"We can hire a comfort alpha," her mother protested.

"She needs Roxy, and Roxy needs me," Merlin said firmly.

"You are alpha-a and you won't be tempted by the heat?" the prince pressed. He looked at Merlin's crotch where his trousers were a bit tented. 

Merlin shook his head. "I will not touch Tilde except for a hug, or pack cuddle pile."

"You can't promise that."

"He can," Percival said. "If he says he won't, he won't. To him, she is pack and not a potential mate, he won't hurt her."

They could all read the sincerity in Percival's voice. Merlin for just a moment opened the door wide and they could see Tilde being held by Roxy who was crooning to her. It was the first time in hours Tilde wasn't crying.

"She is safe with us, I swear this," Merlin promised.

Tilde's parents nodded and left two guards with Harry and Percival at the door, with orders to hurt anyone who hurt Tilde.

Merlin handed off the filthy sheets to a maid who gave him a clean set. He dressed the bed and kept an eye on the couple. "Bring her to the bed Roxy," he said softly. Roxy carried Tilde over and lay her down. "Go on and give her a good cuddle, let her smell you," Merlin said.

"I'm scared I'll fuck up," Roxy said.

"Why I'm here little warrior," Merlin replied. He took off his shirt and lay down. "Hello Tilde," he said.

She looked at him. "Why are you doing this?"

"My pack needs me," he said simply. Tilde pushed Roxy's hands off her and curled into Merlin.

Roxy whimpered as Merlin pulled Tilde close. He glared at her and Roxy bit her lip.

"Shh, been hurting fierce haven't ye?" he crooned. Tilde nodded against his chest. "We'll protect ye, keep ye safe." He kissed her head. "We are here with ye, and offer aid and succor to one we dream of being pack. I stand before ye as the alpha leader, and will prove to ye, ye are safe in our shelter. And your mate will not dishonour you, ever."

"She doesn't want me," Tilde said, voice muffled.

"I want you forever," Roxy said. "I want to slay dragons for you, storm any castle. Hell sort of did that tonight."

Tilde laughed a little. "I need...it's starting to hurt again. Which of you is going to fuck me?"

Roxy growled low, in pleasure at the thought of fucking her Tilde, and in jealousy that Merlin was even an option. Merlin growled back at her and even in this moment, Roxy tilted her head for him. 

"Neither of us," Merlin said. "Breathe us in and be comforted, and Roxy can help ye with the dildos."

"What's the point of having two fucking prime alphas in my bed if they aren't going to fuck me?" Tilde shouted.

"Because we love you," Roxy answered.

"To be fair, I don't love ye, but I know I will hold ye in the highest affection and esteem," Merlin said. "Do what ye need to for relief, we will see ye taken care of."

Tilde nodded and she reached out and Roxy handed her a dildo. As Tilde began to take care of herself she gravitated away from Merlin and towards Roxy. She finally came on the plastic knot with Roxy holding her tight and nuzzling but not biting her.

It was a rough 36 hours, and Merlin had to stop Roxy twice from going too far when Tilde begged for more. Percival occasionally passed in a tray of food. 

But eventually Tilde passed out and her scent finally grew mild.

"Come on Roxy, we need a shower," Merlin said. They went into the ensuite and Roxy hesitated. "Oh for fuck's sake." Merlin rolled his eyes and stripped all the way down, his clothes disgusting. "Two shower heads. Not like we having seen each other dicks before." He stepped under the water and began to scrub.

Roxy took her pants off and stepped under the water ignoring her erection. It hurt like hell but she wouldn't touch herself while Tilde slept in the other room. She scrubbed her skin harshly when Merlin passed her the soap. She leaned in when Merlin hugged her.

"Fucking proud of ye little warrior," Merlin said and kissed her pack bite.

Roxy was grateful the water hid her tears.

They got out and dried off, and walked past the still sleeping Tilde. Percival had clothes waiting for them and they dressed and went to find food and then they passed out, exhausted in a giant bed, cuddled by Harry and Percival.

****************************************

Tilde looked at the four of them sleeping.

She was so mad at all of them. Especially Roxy. 

Words couldn't express how much they hurt her. She felt like a fool.

"Wake up!" she shouted and they all snapped awake, Harry and Merlin reaching for weapons.

Roxy looked at Tilde's cold face and just nodded. "We'll be gone within the hour."

Tilde stalked out of the room.

Percival held his daughter tight and Harry looked ready to fight a war. Merlin just nuzzled her but otherwise didn't react.

They packed the little they brought and guards were escorting them to the door.

Tilde's mother looked happy to see the last of them, but her father was much less so.

They were almost at the door when they heard running. "Wait," Tilde called. Everyone stopped and turned to her. Tilde went right up to Roxy and stopped. The two women stood there, staring at each other. Tilde kicked Roxy in the shin.

"Ow," Tilde said. "Ow, that hurt more than I thought. What did I do wrong?" 

"Ye hit right where the shin bone is strongest," Merlin explained. He came over. "Your best bet, kick a little higher, right under the knee cap, see?" Merlin kicked up at half strength right into the knee cap and Roxy crumbled.

"Oi!" Roxy shouted from the ground. "Son of a bitch that hurt."

"Oh, right, sorry," Merlin said. "I'll just move over there." He went to go stand with Harry and Percival who was giving him a bit of a dirty look, but was stopped by Tilde. "Yes?"

Tilde pulled him in for a tight hug. "Anyone would be honoured to have you as pack alpha and mate. You are an incredible man."

"You are too kind," he said. "I'm all sorts of horrible."

"Then it is the right sort of horrible," she said. She kissed his cheek and then pushed him to the side. She looked down at Roxy still on the ground. "Stand up, alpha," Tilde said.

Roxy got up and looked at Tilde. "For what it is worth, I am sorry I lied and I was a coward. The second you got off the plane I should have begged you to be mine. I hope you find all the happiness and joy you deserve."

"Shut up," Tilde said. "You were willing to sacrifice yourself before, and it caused this mess. And now you do it again? You assume you know my answer. You assume from a handful of letters and more emails, and a week of a visit that you know my whole mind? Fuck you." Tilde glared at Roxy. "Well?"

"I'm sorry?" Roxy had no clue. She looked at her men and they were equally dumbfounded.

"Ask to court me!" Tilde yelled. "You, alpha Roxy, ask to court me for yourself!" She crossed her arms and raised a brow. "I'm waiting," she said when Roxy stared at her dumbfounded.

"Tilde, may I please court you, with the intent to ask you to become my mate and join the pack of Logan Mathe?" Roxy asked.

"You may. Now go home," Tilde said.

"Why are you giving me a chance?" Roxy had to ask.

"Because I want my true mate, no matter how much of a fucking moron she is," Tilde replied. "And because of how you were up there. That woman, that alpha, who could do that? Deserves a proper chance. Go home and write me a letter Roxy." Tilde nodded to all of them and swept away.

They got in their rental car and Roxy's scent was strong enough they had to open the windows.

"I have a chance," she said to them.

"Don't fuck it up," Merlin said.

Roxy began to laugh. "I'm gonna fuck it up so hard."

"You will my dear, but Tilde seems to find that an attractive feature of yours, so just run with it," Percival suggested.


	11. Chapter 11

"That is a large envelope my dear," her mother said when Tilde was handed her mail. "How long a letter did she write you?"

Tilde tore open the envelope and several envelopes fell out. "They all wrote me," she said and tried not to smile at her pack.

Not her pack, right.

Not yet.

"Excuse me, Mama," Tilde said and took them all up to her room. She put the four envelopes on her bed.

Roxy.

Harry.

Percival.

Merlin.

"Eenie meenie minie mo," she whispered to herself. But she already knew she was saving Roxy for last. She decided to start with Harry. She opened the envelope and pulled out the exquisite paper.

_Dear Princess Tilde,_

_I am deeply sorry for my part in this whole debacle. I was so concerned with happiness for Merlin, for my oldest friend that I did not see how I was stopping my daughter and you from achieving your own happiness._

_I am also incredibly ashamed that I was treating you more as an object, a vessel for making others better, than focusing on you as a person._

_I hope that I get the chance to rectify this, and truly get to know you._

_Sincerely,_

_Harry Hart._

It was a simple letter, but Tilde could feel his sincerity. Tilde realized that for all that he had been the one to start this mess, he had been the one she had gotten to know the least. She wanted to change that. She set his letter aside and picked up Percival's which felt a bit thicker. She smiled when it was clearly printed out and not hand written. And had a small data drive.

_To Tilde,_

_I have cut you a cheque for the services offered to Kingsman Games during your stay. While you did it as a kindness, I cannot accept you doing all the incredible work and beautiful organization and not pay you. Including on this data drive is the information about taking the job as head of Human Resources for Kingsman Games, should you want it, should you return to the pack. It has salary, benefits, long term needs, etc. I admit I also include a list of the downsides of working for us, though I feel you and I together could be a bulwark against their worst impulses._

_I like your work ethic, your databases, and the way you made my daughter smile._

_I liked what I knew of you, Tilde, and would enjoy the chance to know more._

_Please consider taking us back,_

_Yours in elegant spreadsheets,_

_Percival_

Tilde had to laugh at that. She had really gotten along with Percival, and he would make a wonderful father in law. She stared at the other two envelopes and figured they could wait a few minutes. She went to her desk and put in the data drive to her lap top and read.

"Holy shit," she said, staring at what they would pay her. "Are you crazy?" she scrolled and burst out laughing when she saw in other notes:

 _no I am not crazy budgeting this much pay. You will have to deal with Harry occasionally tying people to the ceiling. Trust me I am under paying you_.

A few months ago she would have thought that a joke. But she knew them better now. She read the files and made a few notes for herself and decided to email Percival with her questions. She found his listing on the Kingsman webpage and fired off an email to ask for more details about vacation time, and bonuses.

She added at the end,  _your pdfs are more beautiful than any bouquet I have ever seen_.

Tilde thought he'd rather enjoy that.

She stared at the two envelopes on her bed and decided that some air and a snack would help. In the kitchens the cook hugged her and gave her some cookies. Tilde went back to her room and opened Merlin's letter and spit her cookie all over the bed.

_Think you could send some fruit tarts?_

_Merlin_

Oh my god, the silly man. She'd like to think that he was sending a deeper message, that there was a metaphor in there.

But there wasn't. The guy really just wanted fruit tarts.

Tilde decided to ignore Roxy's letter a little longer and went back down to the kitchen and made the fruit tarts but Merlin deserved them. He deserved so much.

Tilde managed to put off reading Roxy's letter for a day, she was very good at delay tactics when the situation called for it but finally she settled into her bed and opened it. She didn't know what to expect.

_Dear Tilde,_

_imsorryimsorryimsorryimsorryimsorrysosorrypleasesosorryforgivemeyouareperfectandiamatwatandsosorrysosorrypleaseforgivemei'lldobetterpromisejustforgivemeplease._

Tilde had to stop reading because i was three pages of variation on that written is such a small script that it was illegible.

Well then.

**********************************

"Stop being smug that you've heard from her and we haven't," Harry glared at his mate.

Percival was smiling and lording it over Harry that he was liked best. He made sure though never to do so around Roxy who had been moping and alternating between eating donuts and fighting with Merlin in the gym. But still, making his mate suffer was a nice bonus. "She and I share a kinship, a bond, more powerful than any pack bite. It is the bound of well done paperwork. It is an art form, a gift from the heavens and -"

Harry nipped at Percival's neck to get him to shut up. Only it was nice and he nipped and nuzzled again when Percival tilted his neck. He pulled at Percival's arm and his perfect beta went into his lap. "Hello," Harry growled a bit.

"Hello," Percival said and kissed him. He ground down when Harry cupped his ass.

"Oh gross," Roxy groaned. "We agreed not at the table."

"You and Merlin agreed," Harry said, not letting go. "I didn't." He whimpered when Percival got off his lap.

"How are you doing my dear?" Percival asked, like he hadn't been almost giving Harry a lap dance 20 seconds ago.

Roxy flopped in her chair. "Why hasn't she written me back?" Her scent was so sad that it completely killed Harry's desire. They both cuddled Roxy and made her promises that Tilde would write, that it would be okay.

Merlin came in a few minutes later with a box. "Sweden," he said holding it up. Roxy jumped and ran and he growled and clutched the box close. "It smells like fruit tarts." The growled at each other a little until Percival sighed, came over and plucked the box away. 

He put it on the table and held out a hand and Harry's boot knife was placed in his palm. He cut the box open carefully and moved about all the packaging. "She did send you fruit tarts, Merlin."

"Ha!" Merlin crowed and reached for the box. He pouted when Percival only handed him one. "Mine."

"You have that doctor's appointment, no gorging on sugar," Percival said. Merlin growled a little and Percival was unmoved. Percival then handed out envelopes to everyone.

Merlin stuffed the last of the tart in his mouth and tore it open. "Enjoy," he read, mouth still half full. "Good letter. I like it."

They all rolled their eyes. 

Percival opened his and it had a data drive in it. He read the letter and sighed happily. "Staffing recommendations for the next quarter. We need to keep her."

Roxy whimpered a bit. "I want to keep her." Percival winced at his putting his foot in his mouth and hugged her.

Harry skimmed his letter. "She accepted my apology and looks forward to getting to know me more." He nodded pleased. He had a chance to fix this.

Roxy ripped hers open. "Do better?" She flipped the page over but no other words appeared. "DO BETTER? THAT WAS THREE PAGES OF I'M SORRY. How much better does she want?" Roxy began to pace and growl and kept muttering "do better?" over and over.

"Well she didn't want your apology did she?" Merlin asked. He was inching closer to the box and frowned when Percival moved it away. 

"Huh?" Roxy replied.

"She told you, she was tired of self sacrifice. She wanted you to court her. Did you letter actually do that? She seemed like some romance would the way to go." Merlin looked at them all as they stared at him in shock. "What?"

"How do you know that?" Harry asked. 

Merlin shrugged. "Seems obvious, isn't it?"

"But she doesn't seem like the super girly princess sort. I mean aside from the fact that she's a princess. She got more misty eyed over Dad's power points than she did that Audrey Hepburn movie we all watched."

"All sorts of different types of romance," Merlin said. "Look at them." He pointed to Harry and Percival. "For them the height of romance is your father letting Harry have an extra half scoop of ice cream, and Harry letting your father drill him on any available surface." He shrugged. "She just wants you to find the romance that works right for the two of you."

"When did you get good at people?" Harry asked astonished.

"I'm not," Merlin answered. "I'm good with my pack, you aren't people."

Roxy ran up and hugged Merlin. "Right. Thanks. I've got this. I will romance the shit out of her." Roxy left them all to start her romance campaign.

*******************************

"Another package?" her father asked.

"Yes," Tilde said and looked up and realized her parents were curious. She shrugged and opened it up. And there were knives and brass knuckles and a baton in there. 

All three of them stared at the gift.

"I don't understand," her mother admitted.

Tilde carefully moved the weapons and saw an old book. It was a mating guideline from the 1950s and it had a little post it tab in it. She opened it to the page and read the underlined part. "An alpha must always be ready to defend the honour of their omega. Omegas are weak and will crumble when faced with too much aggression. It is your job to protect their delicateness." Tilde snorted at that and then looked at the scrap of paper Roxy had put in. "You awe me with how strong you are, Tilde. I will teach you to match that internal strength with external punches so you can defend yourself."

"That is crazy," her mother said. She looked up and saw that Tilde was smiling softly. "Dearest?"

"It's so sweet," Tilde replied. 

"Sweet?" her parents said in perfect sync.

"Oh the one knife has butterflies painted on it," Tilde crooned. "Like how her stepfather adores." She picked up the box and cradled it as she went upstairs.

"That is not a good courting gift," Tilde's mother protested.

Her father laughed. "It seems though, it was."

Tilde laid out each weapon on her desk, and smiled at them happily. She even pet the one knife a bit. It was such a lovely thought. 

She couldn't wait to see what was next.


	12. Chapter 12

"I can't handle this," Merlin said staring at Roxy.

"I admit, I thought things would be going better by now," Percival agreed from the door where they were all spying on her.

"Tilde should be in the fold by now, why doesn't she see how great Roxy is?" Harry growled a little.

"Because I'm not that great," Roxy called out to them.

The three men quickly disappeared down to Merlin's office. They sat around and tried to think. "I could bribe her?" Merlin offered. "We have lots of money."

"So does she," Percival pointed out.

"We kidnap her," Harry nodded. "It's the perfect plan."

"We could do it," Merlin said thoughtfully. "I have a guy in Norway, he could help us out. Been awhile since we arranged a kidnapping, always was one of the better jobs." Merlin reached for his phone.

"NO!" Percival stared at them. "Idiots we aren't kidnapping a princess. There are so many things wrong with that statement."

"But Roxy wants her," Harry and Merlin said at the same time.

"Would you have kidnapped me if I had said no, or at least not yet?" Percival snapped at Harry. He looked at his mate and waited. "Harry?" He glared at the foolish man.

"No of course not," Harry added quickly. "Kidnapping bad. It would have been a spontaneously trip to the Italian Villa. That you couldn't really say no to. I do very well in Italy, you know."

"Yes, you do," Percival sighed in agreement. "But no kidnapping. No spontaneous trips that involve someone being removed from their home in the middle of the night. No nothing that could potentially get you arrested."

"Ahh," Merlin said and started quickly typing on his keyboard.

Percival pinched his nose under his glasses. "Do I want to know?"

"Nae, probably not. For the sake of not having to lie in court." Merlin typed a little more and then smiled. "All taken care of."

"I hate you," Percival groaned.

"No ye don't."

"Okay, no I don't, but we need to let Roxy figure this out on her own. They are exchanging letters, it is moving forward. It isn't unreasonable that Tilde wants to go slow after how it all shook out," Percival said. "Though I do wish it would go a little quicker. Roxy keeps eating a lot of donuts."

Harry hugged him and then smiled, and his scent went pleased. The sort of pleased that frankly scared Percival because it always cost a great deal of money. "I have an idea."

"Of course you do," Percival nuzzled him. "Not over 3 thousand."

"I might need a little more than that."

"How much more?"

Merlin looked at Harry and sniffed. "That scent is at least 5k."

"It comes out of your personal Harry had a stupid idea account."

"But it is for the good of the pack. It should come out of the dear god we are all morons, you've ruined me account."

"Split 50/50," Percival said. "Because I don't notice you telling me the idea."

"Oh yes, well here is the idea," Harry began.

*********************************************

Roxy groaned and woke up. She felt a little groggy like she had been drugged. She realized that she was at the city flat and didn't know how she got here. Which meant she was in fact drugged. She'd kill Harry later. But maybe this was a surprise and Tilde was out there. She got up in her ninja pajamas and went out calling "Tilde? Did they kidnap you too?" Her scent was rising and she ran.

And found her grandmothers and Carol sitting in the kitchen. Grand Eliza making her a lovely breakfast scramble and her grandmother knitting and Carol sketching.

"Hi?" she asked. "Uh...Harry drugged me."

"Yes, dear, he is quite fond of that. As well you remember from that surprise trip to Paris when you were 16," Eliza said and gave the pan a shake and slid the food onto the plate. She put it at an open seat and put the pan back. She poured herself a cuppa and sat down. "Hello, darling."

Brenna kissed Roxy's head. "Here you've been courting and decided not to share with us?" 

"You've been sick," Roxy protested.

"A flu that caused a spot of trouble is not enough that I shouldn't be informed that my granddaughter is out being a moron," Brenna put down the knitting, her fingers too tight to really work. "Eliza, you've been well. Were you informed?"

"No, I wasn't," Eliza sipped her tea. "And I've been quite hale and hearty. New knees have been a godsend. So why didn't I know my beautiful girl had found love?"

Roxy looked to Carol for help who was just grinning. "Haha, you suck more than Harry. I didn't think that was humanly possible!" She laughed some more. "I got flown in special, Harry spent a fortune. There was a phone call at like 1am saying terribly sorry, but you are on the first flight back to London. She needs girl power. And yes he said girl power and go women and we aren't allowed to kidnap Tilde so I'm kidnapping you to help fix my daughter. Remember you promised to help me twice a year. Help my daughter."

"They could kidnap Tilde," Roxy muttered.

"Oh darling," Eliza shook her head. "Those boys have really warped your understanding of love haven't they?"

"Hey, I understand love. You fuck up and they fuck up and there are battle axes and cricket bats and then cuddles and sex and cheesy Tom Jones love songs playing." Roxy growled at the women and none of them reacted a little. "That's love isn't it?"

"It is," Brenna said. "But that is love for your father and Harry, god bless them. What is love for you, Roxy?"

Roxy opened her mouth and then closed it again. "Her?"

"That's a lovely start. But you need to figure out what it means for you," Eliza said. "And that is why we were brought in." The doorbell rang. "Excellent." She went to answer it.

"Who's that? A psychologist?" Roxy asked.

Carol went into the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of orange juice and three bottles of champagne. "In house drunken spa day to sort you out."

"Oh that is fucking spectacular!" Roxy said in Merlin's cadence. "Let's do this."

*********************************

"My dear, have you considered sending her a dick pic?" Eliza asked as she lay down on a cot and had her facial. "A classy one, of course." She may have been on her fourth mimosa.

"Grand Eliza!" Roxy was getting a pedicure and almost bobbled her drink. "She's a princess, I can't do that. It's gross." She frowned. "Can I? How do you actually make it classy?"

Brenna hiccuped. "Lace? Frame it all pretty?"

Carol rolled her eyes. "No dick pics. I see where they get it from." The two grandmothers both gasped dramatically. "Now are you skyping or face timing or anything?"

"Not yet no," Roxy said sadly. "I miss her face. It is so pretty. Here, where's my phone? I'll show you." Roxy looked around herself.

"You showed us dear. Four times," Eliza said. She sighed a little as fingers massaged her cheeks. "Oh this is lovely."

"Percival said she has a practical streak, like him," Brenna said. She was just sitting on the sofa, not having anything done at the moment. "So practical gifts?"

"I did that!" Roxy shouted quite proud of herself. "I sent her a box of fighting knives." The three women just sighed. "Shut up, she loved it."

"A home office," Carol suggested. "All of you have a home office in the estate. Make her one up."

"Isn't that a little presum...perspum...getting ahead of myself?" Roxy asked, a little tongue tied. She stared down at the glass. "And why does Grand Eliza have better tolerance than me? You are ancient."

"And been drinking champagne since I was 13, the stuff makes me loose at most," she replied. "I refuse to let it intoxicate me."

"That is a very Harry sentence," Carol said. "And I've been working with video game dude bros. My tolerance is getting wicked high. Fuck I hate the job."

"Why don't you come home?" Roxy asked.

"Because that would prove Harry right, and fuck that shit. The job is great, but the dudes. Harry spoiled me that I would actually get listened to. Merlin also. But I don't finish the contract they'll be like ha the girl can't handle it." Carol made a grumpy noise. "My last day, I'm showing them how much I can handle. Harry taught me some tricks. And then I'm coming back to Kingsman Games."

They all cheered.

When Roxy wasn't looking Eliza took the phone she had stolen and tapped it. Like Roxy's password was hard. Girl really needed to use the thumbprint option. She waited for the pickup and put the phone down. "Darling what is it that you love about Tilde, you really don't know her that well?"

"Harry fell in love with Dad when Dad wore a tie that Harry gave him," Roxy said. "She's beautiful."

"So are you, so are lots of people. That's attraction," Brenna said, seeing what Eliza had done. "So what?"

"No, she's beautiful," Roxy pressed the word. "She's so smart, and clever. And she takes us in stride. Do you know how few people do that? She taps her fingers in this annoying way and I am charmed by it? She is sweet and kind, and takes zero shit. She glares and I want to go to my knees and worship her. And fuck do I want to go to my knees for my queen. Lick her open and make her scream and drown in her and -"

"Yes darling, perhaps enough of that in front of your grandmothers?" Eliza suggested. The spa worker began to strip the mask off her.

"I could hear some more," Carol said. She flinched at the glares from the older women. "But later. How do you picture your perfect day with Tilde?"

Roxy hums a little. "We wake up late. I bring her breakfast in bed."

"You can't cook."

"I can cook a little. But I bribe Dad to make me breakfast to take Tilde in bed. And we eat and we just laze about and cuddle for a few hours. I brush her hair. It's stupid but I want to spend hours brushing her hair. And then we go to the gym and I teach her some of the things Merlin has taught me. We play on my old jungle gym in the garden. Or I do and she fusses with the flowers. She mentioned once that she'd love to dig her hands in. We go into the village for dinner. Candlelight. And when we get home we hear the boys bickering over a movie and go in and she just gives them that look and gets the movie pick, because they are almost as fond of her as I am. And we have a big pack pile and shout at the movie and each other. Depending we all fall asleep together, or she and I go to our suite and I make love to her until we both can't breathe." Roxy heard a sniffle and saw the other three crying. "I just want her near. I haven't even had a proper chance with her yet and I feel like a limb is missing. An organ."

Eliza hung up the phone. "Tell her that in a letter. A person wants to know the shape of their future with their potential mate. Tell her what you dream of."

"Thanks Grand Eliza," Roxy said. "Thank you, all of you. Glad Harry drugged me. Though of course I will have my revenge."

"Dye all his shirts pink," Carol suggested.

Brenna was falling asleep. "Have your father cut him off for a week," she muttered before snoring.

Eliza tossed a USB drive to Roxy. "Use the footage on this wisely, dear girl."

Roxy did her best evil laugh and looked down. "Ooh sparkly toes, yay!" She was in a good mood and flush with possibilities.

****************************************

"Ugh, where the hell is that file?" Roxy screamed in frustration. It was the shittiest day ever at work. She needed the press release and it was missing. Harry was supposed to help her with an art idea and was out sick. Merlin was grumpy because a bug had been found in some of the coding and wasn't going away. He hadn't even come in this morning. And she hadn't had so much as an email from Tilde in 4 days.

And people kept knocking on her door to put out fires that weren't actually her job.

She needed five minutes of quiet or she would murder someone.

So of course there was a knock. She growled low and deep and her scent spiked from grumpy to anger. "Consider very carefully before you pop your head through that door, because I promise there is an 80% chance I will eat your heart." Roxy smiled, a vicious angry thing, when no head popped through. "Damn right."

"What if you already have my heart though? Do you need to eat it if it is yours?" A voice with a sweet lilt called out.

Roxy froze.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Oh mary mother of god holy shit.

She stood up and looked around the room and herself and sort of flailed for a moment. Door. Right. She hurried over and opened the door.

Freckles.

There were those perfect freckles.

And the smell of carrot. That was weird.

Roxy looked down and Tilde was holding a small carrot cake.

Tilde smiled. "Merlin said it was your favourite. It took me a few days to learn."

"You are my favourite," Roxy whispered. She tugged Tilde close and Tilde dropped the box and soon they were kissing.

Percival took Harry's hand. "Your idea worked." They were watching the reunion from a few meters away.

"It had to happen at some point." Harry nuzzled Percival's bite. "Don't worry, I won't let it go to my head."

Merlin frowned. "Do ye think we can rescue the cake, Tilde worked her ass off this morning on it."

"Please focus on the happy ever after for your pack that is happening before your eyes," Harry said and growled a little at Merlin.

"But cake."

"The cake is a lie," Harry snapped.

"You hate that game."

"Well it's barely a game," Harry replied and soon the two were bickering.

Percival ignored them and took several photos of his daughter kissing her mate.


	13. Chapter 13

"Hello," Tilde said to Roxy as she woke up.

"Hello," Roxy replied and nuzzled Tilde's neck, getting her scent all over her mate - like she hadn't been doing that very thoroughly for the last 36 hours. "Mmmm, pretty princess."

"I need food and a shower," Tilde said but she didn't move away from Roxy.

"Noooo shower," Roxy whined. "Not when you smell so good."

Tilde rolled her eyes. "I smell like sex and you."

"Yeah you do," Roxy grinned. "Come on. Food." Roxy got up and put on a robe. 

"Shouldn't we shower first?" Tilde protested.

"Nah, the guys will all be at work. Hell we can walk around naked if we want."

"I think I will wear a robe." Tilde put one on as well and they walked hand in hand down to the kitchen. Where sure enough the guys were all reading and drinking tea and coffee.

Merlin sniffed the air and looked at them. "Do nae get as much spunk on my furniture as your father's do," he said to Roxy. "There is a bottle of febreeze in every damn room, even the attic. And baby wipes. Use them."

Tilde turned bright red and went to the fridge to see what was available.

Roxy just looked smug as she sat at the table and put her feet up in Harry's lap. "Good morning all," she said.

"Good morning," Percival greeted. "You two are moving a few rooms down."

"I love my rooms," Roxy protested. "And like I haven't heard you two. Harry is a bloody shouter when you bone him."

Tilde straightened and looked at them in shock. "The beta fucks the alpha?"

It was Harry's turn to go red. "We are a progressive house," he said stiffly.

Percival just grinned and looked as smug as his daughter.

"So I could use a strap on, on you Roxy, yes?" Tilde asked.

"Ewwww," the men all said as Roxy scent went straight to arousal.

"You have two seconds to grab food babe," Roxy warned and stood up. "Maybe consider running."

Tilde grabbed an apple. "Like you could catch me." She ran and Roxy chased.

"FEBREEZE!!!!!" Merlin shouted after them. "Bloody estate is going to smell like jizz. I'm going to the flat for a few days."

"They could use some privacy," Percival agreed. They all heard a thud and decided to vacate the estate quickly.

*****************************************************

"I don't get it," Roxy said.

"It is pretty simple to get, yes?" Tilde replied. "We are mates, there has to be a binding ceremony. I am of royal blood and we have to follow certain protocols."

"You want to put my pack in a room with a king in it." Roxy looked at the binder Tilde brought out. "Merlin and Harry in a room with how many people?"

"We can go small, only 180 or so people," Tilde promised.

"I...oh god," Roxy said and ran.

Tilde packed up the binder and went to find Percival. "She panicked."

"I warned you she would," Percival held open an arm and Tilde snuggled in.

"But she does presentations to crowds much larger than this," Tilde sighed. "Does this matter less?"

"No, it is that it matters more. And at least at your ceremony, you will likely not have to have the guests sign an NDA and all agree that the last they saw of a man he left alive," Percival said cheerfully.

Tilde nodded "Yes that is about what I expected."

"I didn't actually sign the papers, too busy shagging, so I'll tell you about it," he promised. "Now let's deal with logistics."

"I have lists."

"And I am sure they are beautiful."

******************************************************

Tilde wore a crown for a week when she beat them all in the great 12 hour Mario Kart challenge.

******************************************************

She woke up alone.

Tilde listened and thought she could hear them all talking and went to investigate. Merlin's door was open and he and Harry were standing up, embraced tightly, Merlin nuzzling Harry. Percival and Roxy were on the bed and Percival didn't react at all when Merlin kissed Harry. Tilde started to back away, wanting to give the pack space.

"Come on in," Merlin whispered. "Bad night."

"I'm not pack yet," she replied. "I don't want to intrude."

Harry stopped gripping Merlin for a second and held out his hand. Tilde walked into the room and took it. Harry gripped tight. "You are one of us," he said.

Tilde kissed his fingers and went to the bed and let Roxy spoon her. Eventually Harry and Merlin joined them, and Harry was pushed in the middle and surrounded, Percival and Merlin both snuggling him. Tilde wasn't sure what to do, and found herself singing a very old lullaby in her native tongue. Everyone in the room relaxed and scents were soothed. She brought some peace to the pack.

Her pack, she thought as she drifted off.

********************************************************

"Good," was all Merlin said when she finally landed a decent punch.

********************************************************

Roxy stood there is a tux, her pack beside her. "Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck," she whispered. The officiant glared at her until Merlin growled at him. The room was so full of very important people looking very serious and Roxy was freaking out. "Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck."

Merlin pressed his hand against her pack bite. "Soon, little warrior. Stand strong."

"She deserves better than me," Roxy hissed.

All three men growled. "There is nothing and no one better than you, darling," Percival said.

"Will you four calm down," the officiant said much louder than he meant to. The whole room stared.

"Fuck off," Roxy shouted. Merlin growled low and deep enough most of the front rows were tilting there heads.

The doors at the back opened and Roxy's head snapped around. "Mine," she said loudly when she saw Tilde in her beautiful dress. "Mine mine mine."

Tilde looked at the four of them up there, all tense and angry and in theory ruining a stunning and solemn ceremony. She began to giggle and when the slow music started she didn't care that she left her father behind. She didn't care about protocol. She ran to Roxy as fast as the yards of fabric would let her.

Roxy caught her. "Mine," she growled.

Tilde grinned. "Mine," she countered.

"Decorum, Princess," the officiant said in horror. "Dignity!"

"Not with my pack," Tilde replied. "Now let's make this official so we can go dance. I want to dance with my alpha."

"I want to dance with my mate," Roxy said. Tilde realized that Roxy never called her her omega, it was always her mate. It was perfect.

The officiant tried to bring everyone to proper attention and someone managed to finish the ceremony. He sighed though when the couple kissed and the three men shouted and cheered. 

********************************************************

"You will not fuck up the pack bite this time," Harry said.

"I didn't fuck it up last time!" Merlin replied. "You told me to do it." It was a fight that never stopped.

They started bickering and soon enough the weapons came out. And then Roxy and Percival entered the fray annoyed that the two were ruining the moment.

Tilde watched them all fighting and sparring, their scents happy as clams and not at all aggressive. "Idiot pups," she said. She would never want to join the fight like how they did, but that didn't mean she couldn't win. She shot the taser into the group and snickered when it caught Harry who went down.

They all stared at her in shock.

Tilde went and knelt at Merlin's feet. "I declare you my pack alpha, my actions will only bring you honour and pride, your will is my will, your wish is my wish," she said and then said the Swedish version as well.

Merlin helped her stand and had Roxy take Tilde's hand and gently tilted her head. "You honour us our princess," he said and lay a pack bite on her neck, Roxy touching her personal bite at the same time. Tilde found herself hugged by all of them, even Harry hugging her ankles where he was still laid out on the ground.

*********************************************************

"Merlin, you know the truth by now yes?" Tilde asked at the office one day when they were tidying up files. "Of how Roxy and I met, the why we met?"

Merlin barely looked over from his computer. "Yes of course," he said.

"No fucking clue, huh?"

"Not really, you are here and perfect and mated and all that, do I have to care?"

"No, you don't," Tilde said and got up. She kissed his cheek. "You could use a mate you know."

"Nope," he said firmly. "Watching you two reinforced the belief that Harry and Percival created in me. Mating is too crazy a business."

"Consider it, it is lovely."

"Nope."

"Fine. Fruit tarts are rationed until you agree to our plans." Tilde smiled at him.

"You bitch," he said in horror and growled a little.

She tilted her head but smiled. "One every two weeks," she repeated and walked out.

"I'm never falling in love," he shouted after her.

"One every three weeks," she replied and went to her office. She did some work until lunch time and there was a knock. "Come in Roxy," she called.

"Hey babe, wanna go out?" Roxy asked.

Tilde looked up and Roxy was wearing Tilde's favourite suit, with a tie Tilde had bought her. "How about we stay in for lunch?"

Roxy grinned and locked the door. "An excellent idea."

An hour later Tilde looked around the room. "Fuck, we're out of febreeze."

Roxy began to laugh. "Merlin owns stock at this point, there will be more around somewhere." She kept laughing until Tilde kissed her. 

Roxy made her daily mental thanks for Harry's stupid ideas for mating off Merlin. He really had the best ideas.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading and i hope you enjoyed.

Michelle and Eggsy stared at the pack in horror. Eggsy and Merlin had been home for a week from their honeymoon and finally, finally he was learning the true stories of how everyone got together. It had to be bullshit right?

"You're taking the piss," he said. "Percival come on, please? Tilde?"

They both shook their heads. 

"Merlin was the good courter. That is what you realize all of you are saying right? That Merlin, that Merlin right there, with fruit tart on his face, and mildly tipsy off that American bourbon you bought, that man there in mismatched socks, was the best at courtship in the pack."

"They are mismatched on purpose, it's a fashion choice," Merlin protested and he wiped his mouth. There was nothing that could be done about the tipsy, he was liking the warm feeling. "And I courted the fuck out of you."

"You did, and it was mental. And apparently actually sane," Eggsy shook his head. "Mum?"

Michelle was well into the bourbon too. "Yeah, it lines up with the few whispers I've heard. Think they are serious. And just damn."

Eggsy nodded. "Merlin, the most reasonable one. Wot in the actual fuck?"

"I learned didn't I? From them. I'm bad at people, but I am educable," Merlin said.

"It sounds worse than it was, when it is in story for," Harry tried to offer. "At the time it seemed reasonable."

"Fighting on ledges over socks seemed reasonable? Super duper shitty miscommunication seemed reasonable?" Eggsy sat back in his chair. "Wow, just...wow." He leaned over and nuzzled his alpha. "Who knew, you were the most mature and savvy."

"I feel like I'm supposed to be offended, but warm bourbon tummy," Merlin said. He pulled Eggsy into his lap and held him tight. "I'm good with ye."

"You are," Eggsy agreed and kissed him.

"Right, well that is our cue to exit," Percival said and the pack all got up.

"Febreeze is in the cupboard there," Tilde reminded them. "Wouldn't want the place to smell too much like spunk, yes?"

Roxy snorted and pulled Tilde away so they could have some fun of their own.

Eggsy cupped Merlin's face. "I'll never judge your people skills again. Jesus Christ."

Merlin laughed. "Lad, trust me, you'll judge them again and frequently."

"Yeah, you really suck at people who aren't pack."

"I'll show you suck," Merlin growled.

"Yes please," Eggsy said with a smile.

Goddamn he loved these idiots.


End file.
